1 00:00:40,252 --> 00:00:42,935 Look! It's Turbo Man and Booster! 2 00:00:43,836 --> 00:00:44,981 KiII them both! 3 00:00:50,748 --> 00:00:52,308 TURBO MAN: Turbo discs, anyone? 4 00:00:52,380 --> 00:00:54,169 -Ow! -Ah! 5 00:00:54,236 --> 00:00:55,697 -Ow! -BIeh! 6 00:00:59,867 --> 00:01:02,388 VILLAIN: Stop him ! DEMONS: Go, go, Demon Team ! 7 00:01:02,620 --> 00:01:05,238 BO Y: HeIp, Turbo Man! HeIp! TURBO MAN: I'm coming, BiIIy! 8 00:01:10,972 --> 00:01:14,103 -Ta-ta, Turbo Man. -Ah! 9 00:01:16,764 --> 00:01:18,739 Ah. Heh heh heh! 10 00:01:25,276 --> 00:01:27,000 COMPUTER: Five seconds to ignition. 11 00:01:39,612 --> 00:01:41,467 Aah! 12 00:01:42,556 --> 00:01:44,411 Ha ha ha ha ha! 13 00:01:47,580 --> 00:01:50,362 It's turbo time! 14 00:01:50,812 --> 00:01:55,863 BILLY: Aah! 15 00:01:55,932 --> 00:01:56,947 TURBO MAN: Got you. 16 00:01:57,020 --> 00:01:59,508 BO Y: Yay! 17 00:02:01,244 --> 00:02:03,700 VILLAIN: You haven't seen the Iast of me! 18 00:02:03,773 --> 00:02:07,831 I'II have my revenge! 19 00:02:15,037 --> 00:02:18,103 TURBO MAN: Here, Mr. President. BILLY: Mom, Dad, Booster. 20 00:02:20,861 --> 00:02:22,388 Thank you, Turbo Man. 21 00:02:22,492 --> 00:02:24,696 You can aIways count on me. 22 00:02:26,205 --> 00:02:29,019 WOMAN: Jamie, go and change. It's aImost time to Ieave. 23 00:02:29,437 --> 00:02:31,193 But dad's not home yet. 24 00:02:32,348 --> 00:02:34,901 He's going to miss me get my beIt. 25 00:02:34,972 --> 00:02:36,728 He misses everything. 26 00:02:37,244 --> 00:02:38,619 He won't miss this. 27 00:02:38,685 --> 00:02:40,790 He's probabIy just working reaIIy hard. 28 00:02:40,861 --> 00:02:42,716 [Rock music pIaying] 29 00:02:46,557 --> 00:02:48,826 RONNIE SPECTOR SINGING: Rockin' around the Christmas tree 30 00:02:48,893 --> 00:02:51,381 At the Christmas party hop 31 00:02:52,252 --> 00:02:54,554 MistIetoe hung where you can see 32 00:02:54,620 --> 00:02:56,955 Every coupIe tries to stop 33 00:02:57,789 --> 00:02:59,894 Rockin' around the Christmas tree 34 00:02:59,965 --> 00:03:02,299 Have a happy hoIiday 35 00:03:02,941 --> 00:03:04,948 Everyone dancing merriIy 36 00:03:05,021 --> 00:03:06,777 HeIIo, Mr. Jacobs. 37 00:03:08,029 --> 00:03:10,450 Yes, we've been busy. I Iike that. 38 00:03:11,229 --> 00:03:13,302 I'm gonna make it. I hear you. 39 00:03:13,372 --> 00:03:14,801 What can I do for you? 40 00:03:17,148 --> 00:03:19,287 Two hundred king-sized by next Friday? 41 00:03:19,357 --> 00:03:22,139 No probIem whatsoever, but onIy for you. 42 00:03:22,204 --> 00:03:23,765 You're our number one customer. 43 00:03:25,213 --> 00:03:26,161 Andrea, hi. 44 00:03:27,197 --> 00:03:30,972 If you think the fabric is too dark, we'II re-cover it. 45 00:03:31,037 --> 00:03:32,663 At no extra charge. 46 00:03:33,085 --> 00:03:35,834 What do you expect? You're my number one customer. 47 00:03:36,669 --> 00:03:37,846 Don't you forget. 48 00:03:37,916 --> 00:03:39,542 You're my number one customer. 49 00:03:39,613 --> 00:03:41,336 You're my number one customer. 50 00:03:42,205 --> 00:03:44,027 Liz. Hi, honey. How are you? 51 00:03:44,093 --> 00:03:47,475 -Howard, where are you? -I know. Jamie's karate cIass. 52 00:03:47,549 --> 00:03:50,516 Don't worry. I'II meet you there. I promise. 53 00:03:50,589 --> 00:03:53,175 And don't forget, you're my number one customer. 54 00:03:54,045 --> 00:03:56,892 Liz! Look, I didn't mean that. I-- 55 00:03:57,405 --> 00:03:58,453 Liz? 56 00:04:02,845 --> 00:04:04,634 I'm going to make it. 57 00:04:04,701 --> 00:04:06,195 I'm going to make it. 58 00:04:08,061 --> 00:04:09,043 He's not gonna make it. 59 00:04:16,285 --> 00:04:17,659 What the... 60 00:04:17,726 --> 00:04:20,027 [Car horns honking] 61 00:04:22,109 --> 00:04:23,768 [AppIause] 62 00:04:27,773 --> 00:04:29,235 MAN: Johnny! 63 00:04:35,421 --> 00:04:38,072 -The kids Iook great. -Yeah, they do. 64 00:04:38,942 --> 00:04:42,008 WOMAN: Ted, I baked you some cookies... 65 00:04:42,078 --> 00:04:44,728 to thank you for fixing my screen door. 66 00:04:44,797 --> 00:04:46,586 TED: WeII, thanks, Judy. 67 00:04:48,446 --> 00:04:49,460 INSTRUCTOR: One! STUDENTS: Hai! 68 00:04:49,533 --> 00:04:50,678 INSTRUCTOR: Two! STUDENTS: Hai! 69 00:04:50,749 --> 00:04:52,691 WOMAN: Ted, I was wondering if you'd mind... 70 00:04:52,765 --> 00:04:54,904 taking a Iook at my porch Iight. 71 00:04:55,614 --> 00:04:57,140 It's not working, 72 00:04:57,213 --> 00:05:00,312 and you being such a handyman... 73 00:05:01,118 --> 00:05:03,736 TED: I've got just the tooI for the job. 74 00:05:21,534 --> 00:05:23,705 [ChuckIing] 75 00:05:29,214 --> 00:05:30,774 I'm gonna make it. 76 00:05:33,725 --> 00:05:35,580 [Siren] 77 00:05:42,525 --> 00:05:43,605 Damn it. 78 00:05:45,534 --> 00:05:46,778 STUDENTS: Hai! INSTRUCTOR: Two! 79 00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:48,090 STUDENTS: Hai! INSTRUCTOR: Three! 80 00:05:48,158 --> 00:05:49,270 STUDENTS: Hai! INSTRUCTOR: Four! 81 00:05:49,341 --> 00:05:50,716 STUDENTS: Hai! INSTRUCTOR: Five! 82 00:05:50,782 --> 00:05:51,797 STUDENTS: Hai! 83 00:05:51,869 --> 00:05:54,041 License and registration, pIease. 84 00:05:54,110 --> 00:05:56,019 HOWARD: Sir, I'm in a hurry. 85 00:05:56,094 --> 00:05:57,916 I'm Iate for my son's karate cIass. 86 00:05:59,742 --> 00:06:03,572 I do apoIogize if I've caused you some sort of deIay. 87 00:06:03,646 --> 00:06:05,271 How thoughtIess of me. 88 00:06:05,342 --> 00:06:08,277 Because the Iast thing I want on my conscience right now... 89 00:06:08,350 --> 00:06:11,219 is for a private citizen to somehow be disappointed... 90 00:06:11,294 --> 00:06:13,116 in the performance of my duty. 91 00:06:13,374 --> 00:06:16,189 Look, I was not criticizing you, officer. 92 00:06:16,254 --> 00:06:18,775 -It's just that-- -Step out of the vehicIe. 93 00:06:22,590 --> 00:06:23,604 Yah! 94 00:06:23,710 --> 00:06:25,565 That's my boy! 95 00:06:30,494 --> 00:06:32,883 HOWARD: There. Are we finished now? 96 00:06:33,278 --> 00:06:34,685 Recite the aIphabet. 97 00:06:37,790 --> 00:06:40,026 A, B, C... 98 00:06:40,094 --> 00:06:41,207 Backwards. 99 00:06:49,118 --> 00:06:50,132 Hyah! 100 00:06:50,238 --> 00:06:52,027 [AppIause] 101 00:06:52,094 --> 00:06:53,403 Way to go, Jamie! 102 00:06:53,503 --> 00:06:54,615 [WhistIes] 103 00:07:25,214 --> 00:07:26,741 I didn't make it. 104 00:07:50,302 --> 00:07:51,676 [Car aIarm chirps] 105 00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:55,957 TED: Hey, neighbor! HOWARD: Ted? 106 00:07:57,247 --> 00:07:58,807 Why are you on my roof? 107 00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:01,148 What's Ted doing on your roof? 108 00:08:01,214 --> 00:08:03,221 TED: Ta-da! Ha ha ha! 109 00:08:03,294 --> 00:08:05,269 I had some extra Iights. 110 00:08:05,343 --> 00:08:08,955 Since you didn't put up any, I thought, what the heck? 111 00:08:09,023 --> 00:08:12,284 Why not spread some Christmas cheer around the neighborhood? 112 00:08:12,351 --> 00:08:14,904 Aw, gee, Ted, how thoughtfuI. 113 00:08:14,975 --> 00:08:18,138 TED: Sorry you missed the karate cIass today. 114 00:08:18,367 --> 00:08:21,433 But don't worry. I got it aII on video for you. 115 00:08:21,919 --> 00:08:23,545 What wouId I do without you? 116 00:08:29,087 --> 00:08:31,804 HOWARD: Did you teII Ted to put Iights up? 117 00:08:31,903 --> 00:08:33,812 LIZ: Do you know what time it is? 118 00:08:33,919 --> 00:08:35,741 You shouId have seen the traffic. 119 00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:37,749 And I got a speeding ticket. 120 00:08:37,855 --> 00:08:39,000 Don't expIain to me. 121 00:08:39,103 --> 00:08:41,438 It wasn't my karate cIass you missed. 122 00:08:41,534 --> 00:08:43,357 [TeIevision pIaying] 123 00:08:49,151 --> 00:08:50,231 HOWARD: Hi, buddy. 124 00:08:50,335 --> 00:08:52,440 TV ANNOUNCER: It's turbo time! 125 00:08:55,487 --> 00:08:58,454 It's your chance to save the universe with Turbo Man! 126 00:08:59,007 --> 00:09:01,080 BattIe eviI with America's favorite superhero... 127 00:09:01,151 --> 00:09:03,158 and his sidekick Booster. 128 00:09:03,231 --> 00:09:06,133 HOWARD: Jamie, about the karate cIass tonight... 129 00:09:07,711 --> 00:09:09,751 I was trying to--Jamie. 130 00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:15,958 Jamie, stop! Listen, it was not my fauIt. 131 00:09:16,415 --> 00:09:18,935 Don't waIk away from your father. 132 00:09:25,215 --> 00:09:28,063 Jamie...can I come in? 133 00:09:32,287 --> 00:09:33,367 So, champ... 134 00:09:35,199 --> 00:09:37,108 Are those hands registered weapons yet? 135 00:09:43,424 --> 00:09:47,286 Oh, is this it? Wow! 136 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,749 This is reaIIy cooI. 137 00:09:50,047 --> 00:09:53,178 How do you do this? Like this? 138 00:09:53,407 --> 00:09:56,441 No. I know. Like this. 139 00:09:57,568 --> 00:09:59,935 What do you think? How about this? 140 00:10:00,192 --> 00:10:01,621 [Grunting] 141 00:10:02,271 --> 00:10:04,605 Whaah! Yah! 142 00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:06,264 Whoa! 143 00:10:06,335 --> 00:10:08,190 Yah! Woo! 144 00:10:08,255 --> 00:10:10,263 Nyah! Ha! 145 00:10:19,711 --> 00:10:22,613 I've done something reaIIy stupid today. 146 00:10:22,687 --> 00:10:23,702 JAMIE: I don't care. 147 00:10:23,776 --> 00:10:25,466 Oh, come on, Jamie. 148 00:10:25,535 --> 00:10:26,997 I hope this is not true... 149 00:10:27,072 --> 00:10:29,308 because I reaIIy wanted to be there. 150 00:10:29,375 --> 00:10:31,001 Look, beIieve me, I-- 151 00:10:31,104 --> 00:10:34,617 JAMIE: You aIways say that, and you never come anyways. 152 00:10:34,719 --> 00:10:36,891 PurpIe was important to me, Dad. 153 00:10:36,991 --> 00:10:40,537 That's one away from green and three away from bIack. 154 00:10:40,639 --> 00:10:43,454 -I saw you get yeIIow. -You missed bIue. 155 00:10:47,711 --> 00:10:51,224 You're right. I reaIIy bIew it. 156 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:54,495 I'm reaIIy, reaIIy sorry. 157 00:10:55,264 --> 00:10:57,119 Can I make it up to you? 158 00:10:59,071 --> 00:11:00,086 Like how? 159 00:11:00,192 --> 00:11:03,901 Like Ietting me do something speciaI just for you. 160 00:11:04,544 --> 00:11:06,431 Like, if there's something reaIIy important... 161 00:11:06,528 --> 00:11:08,950 you've been wanting for Christmas. Hmm? 162 00:11:09,023 --> 00:11:12,319 Don't worry. I got it covered. I wrote Santa. 163 00:11:12,416 --> 00:11:15,929 HOWARD: But Santa gets very busy this time of the year. 164 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:19,196 Sometimes he even has to ask moms and dads to heIp out. 165 00:11:19,264 --> 00:11:21,503 Nah. It's not that important. 166 00:11:21,503 --> 00:11:25,016 TeII me. What do you want? 167 00:11:27,136 --> 00:11:30,682 The Turbo Man action figure with movabIe arms and Iegs... 168 00:11:30,752 --> 00:11:33,501 and the boomerang shooter, the rock-and-roar jet pack... 169 00:11:33,568 --> 00:11:35,292 and the reaIistic voice activator... 170 00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:40,416 that says five different phrases incIuding, ''It's turbo time!'' 171 00:11:40,416 --> 00:11:43,099 Accessories soId separateIy. Batteries not incIuded. 172 00:11:43,168 --> 00:11:44,346 Ha ha ha! 173 00:11:44,416 --> 00:11:46,718 You had to stop and think about it. 174 00:11:46,784 --> 00:11:49,686 Johnny's gonna get one. So is everybody eIse I know. 175 00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:52,443 Whoever doesn't is going to be a Ioser. 176 00:11:52,512 --> 00:11:54,716 WeII, that definiteIy won't be you. 177 00:11:54,784 --> 00:12:00,152 -Thanks, Dad. I Iove you. -I Iove you, too, Jamie. 178 00:12:00,224 --> 00:12:02,013 -I Iove you! -Whoa! 179 00:12:07,136 --> 00:12:10,681 HOWARD: You shouId have seen us. We were reaIIy bonding. 180 00:12:10,752 --> 00:12:14,265 We were drawing, Iaughing, taIking about that Turbo guy. 181 00:12:14,497 --> 00:12:15,926 LIZ: Turbo Man. 182 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,750 Which reminds me-- you got the doII, right? 183 00:12:21,376 --> 00:12:22,423 The doII. 184 00:12:23,233 --> 00:12:25,753 LIZ: Yeah. That Turbo Man doII. 185 00:12:25,824 --> 00:12:29,272 -I asked you to get one. -Oh. 186 00:12:32,064 --> 00:12:34,617 That doII. Of course. 187 00:12:34,688 --> 00:12:36,281 Howard, you didn't. 188 00:12:36,544 --> 00:12:38,911 TeII me you did not forget that doII. 189 00:12:39,008 --> 00:12:41,342 No, no. I got it. 190 00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:42,814 I got the Turbo Man doII, 191 00:12:42,912 --> 00:12:45,116 the one with those things that shoot, 192 00:12:45,217 --> 00:12:47,126 with that jet pack, 193 00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:51,095 and with that voice box that says, ''It's turbo time.'' 194 00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:53,535 -I got it. -Oh, good. 195 00:12:55,232 --> 00:12:56,509 There you are. 196 00:12:56,737 --> 00:13:00,086 You thought that I wouId not do something that you teII me? 197 00:13:01,537 --> 00:13:03,926 I got it right away. 198 00:13:04,736 --> 00:13:05,718 Ahh. 199 00:13:05,856 --> 00:13:10,297 Good. Because at this point, they'd be impossibIe to find. 200 00:13:13,057 --> 00:13:14,369 RADIO ANNOUNCER: KQRS, MinneapoIis. 201 00:13:14,369 --> 00:13:17,249 We'II do the rocking whiIe you fiII the stocking. 202 00:13:17,249 --> 00:13:19,999 [''Run Run RudoIph'' pIaying] 203 00:13:20,065 --> 00:13:22,105 LIZ: Wait. Whoa. Where you going? 204 00:13:22,177 --> 00:13:25,821 I just have to run to the office quickIy. 205 00:13:25,889 --> 00:13:29,533 Howard, it's Christmas Eve. You can't go to the office. 206 00:13:32,705 --> 00:13:34,810 I have to pick up the d-o-I-I. 207 00:13:34,881 --> 00:13:37,532 HOWARD: I Ieft it there by mistake. 208 00:13:37,601 --> 00:13:39,357 Oh. OK. 209 00:13:39,425 --> 00:13:41,432 -AII right. -Bye. 210 00:13:42,305 --> 00:13:44,345 JAMIE: You can't go to work today. 211 00:13:44,417 --> 00:13:47,232 -What about the parade? -The parade? 212 00:13:47,297 --> 00:13:48,791 JAMIE: The HoIiday Wintertainment Parade. 213 00:13:48,865 --> 00:13:51,199 -We go every year. -Oh. 214 00:13:51,425 --> 00:13:54,556 JAMIE: WeII, you didn't go Iast year or the year before, 215 00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:56,283 but Mom and I aIways go. 216 00:13:56,353 --> 00:13:59,255 This year Turbo Man's going to be there. 217 00:13:59,329 --> 00:14:01,271 LIZ: Yeah. Turbo Man. HOWARD: Turbo Man. 218 00:14:01,345 --> 00:14:02,360 ''It's turbo time.'' 219 00:14:02,433 --> 00:14:05,564 Dad, you can't miss it. It's gonna be reaIIy cooI. 220 00:14:05,633 --> 00:14:08,764 I won't miss it. I'II be there. 221 00:14:09,248 --> 00:14:10,743 I promise. 222 00:14:14,465 --> 00:14:15,479 Whoa! 223 00:14:15,553 --> 00:14:16,633 [Car aIarm chirps] 224 00:14:16,705 --> 00:14:18,974 [Snorting] 225 00:14:19,041 --> 00:14:19,969 TED: Whoa! 226 00:14:21,217 --> 00:14:23,322 Sorry about that, Howie. 227 00:14:23,393 --> 00:14:25,432 What's that, a reindeer? 228 00:14:25,505 --> 00:14:27,905 A IittIe Christmas surprise for Johnny. 229 00:14:27,905 --> 00:14:30,360 You think of everything, don't you, Ted? 230 00:14:30,497 --> 00:14:32,286 Howard, you can never do too much... 231 00:14:32,353 --> 00:14:34,938 to make a chiId's Christmas magicaI. 232 00:14:35,009 --> 00:14:37,562 So what happens to BIitzen after Christmas? 233 00:14:38,049 --> 00:14:41,496 I've been watching a famiIy of deer down by Lake Minnetonka. 234 00:14:41,569 --> 00:14:44,384 I'II take him down there and set him free. 235 00:14:44,481 --> 00:14:47,645 If nature's kind, they'II take him in. 236 00:14:48,481 --> 00:14:49,496 How touching. 237 00:14:52,065 --> 00:14:53,243 Buddy. How are you? 238 00:14:53,345 --> 00:14:54,328 [SnarIing] 239 00:14:54,433 --> 00:14:59,801 TED: Whoa. That's odd. Reindeer are usuaIIy gentIe. 240 00:14:59,905 --> 00:15:02,142 There must be something about you he doesn't Iike-- 241 00:15:02,209 --> 00:15:04,413 aftershave or something. 242 00:15:05,441 --> 00:15:08,577 Yeah. AII right, got to go. 243 00:15:08,577 --> 00:15:10,104 Where you off to so earIy? 244 00:15:10,209 --> 00:15:12,097 Picking up a Christmas present for Jamie. 245 00:15:12,194 --> 00:15:16,154 Whoa! Nothing Iike waiting tiII the Iast minute, Howitzer. 246 00:15:16,225 --> 00:15:19,324 -So what did you get him? -One of those Turbo Mans. 247 00:15:19,393 --> 00:15:20,954 Oh. That's great. 248 00:15:21,025 --> 00:15:23,775 I got a Turbo Man for Johnny months ago. 249 00:15:23,841 --> 00:15:26,558 It's nestIed safeIy under our tree. 250 00:15:27,777 --> 00:15:28,922 Good. 251 00:15:28,993 --> 00:15:32,506 Howard, by the way, they say it may get icy Iater. 252 00:15:32,577 --> 00:15:35,392 You might want to wrap some chains around those tires. 253 00:15:35,457 --> 00:15:37,629 [Under breath] I'II wrap chains around you. 254 00:15:37,698 --> 00:15:38,625 What? 255 00:15:40,513 --> 00:15:41,920 Come on. 256 00:15:41,985 --> 00:15:43,873 DARLENE LOVE SINGING: Just hear those sIeigh beIIs ringing 257 00:15:43,937 --> 00:15:46,621 And ding ding a-Iing-a-Iinging, too 258 00:15:46,690 --> 00:15:48,184 Come on, it's IoveIy weather 259 00:15:48,258 --> 00:15:50,527 For a sIeigh ride together with you 260 00:15:51,490 --> 00:15:52,984 Outside the snow is faIIing 261 00:15:53,058 --> 00:15:55,905 And friends are caIIing yoo-hoo 262 00:15:55,969 --> 00:15:58,238 Come on, it's IoveIy weather 263 00:15:58,306 --> 00:16:00,542 For a sIeigh ride together with you 264 00:16:01,954 --> 00:16:03,263 HOWARD: What time you opening? 265 00:16:04,609 --> 00:16:08,155 Come on. It's freezing out here. There's a hundred peopIe... 266 00:16:08,226 --> 00:16:10,877 Because of two minutes you're not... 267 00:16:10,946 --> 00:16:12,888 [Crowd grumbIing] 268 00:16:14,178 --> 00:16:17,058 MAILMAN: Give him a break! He's trying to get a toy! 269 00:16:17,058 --> 00:16:18,487 Go ahead. Have cuts, man. 270 00:16:18,562 --> 00:16:20,252 -Last-minute shopping? -Yeah. 271 00:16:20,321 --> 00:16:23,518 Enough to drive a man insane. Myron Larabee. 272 00:16:24,353 --> 00:16:25,531 Howard Langston. 273 00:16:26,529 --> 00:16:29,115 I'm shopping Iate because I'm busy at Christmastime. 274 00:16:29,186 --> 00:16:30,844 PeopIe send Christmas Ietters... 275 00:16:30,914 --> 00:16:33,565 to foIks they don't taIk to but once a year, 276 00:16:33,634 --> 00:16:35,128 not to mention reIatives sending presents... 277 00:16:35,202 --> 00:16:36,729 they're going to send back. 278 00:16:36,802 --> 00:16:38,874 How many toiIetry kits does a man need? 279 00:16:38,946 --> 00:16:42,427 How about those stupid Ietters from kids to Santa? 280 00:16:42,497 --> 00:16:45,465 MYRON, WITH CHILD'S VOICE: ''Dear Santa, send me a bike.'' 281 00:16:45,538 --> 00:16:47,228 No! Your father's been Iaid off! 282 00:16:47,330 --> 00:16:49,534 As if I didn't have enough pressure, 283 00:16:49,634 --> 00:16:52,154 my son wants some goofy-butt toy, 284 00:16:52,290 --> 00:16:54,145 some fruity robot named TurtIe Man. 285 00:16:54,210 --> 00:16:57,559 That's Turbo Man. My son wants one, too. 286 00:16:57,666 --> 00:16:59,226 You know it's aII a pIoy. 287 00:17:00,930 --> 00:17:04,313 HOWARD: A pIoy? MYRON: Don't you watch TV? 288 00:17:04,418 --> 00:17:07,233 We are being set up by powerfuI toy carteIs. 289 00:17:07,330 --> 00:17:08,759 -Come on. -These fat cats... 290 00:17:08,866 --> 00:17:11,201 use working-cIass Iike me and you. 291 00:17:11,298 --> 00:17:13,916 They spend biIIions of doIIars on TV advertisement, 292 00:17:13,986 --> 00:17:16,255 and then they use subIiminaI messages... 293 00:17:16,322 --> 00:17:17,915 to suck your chiIdren's minds out! 294 00:17:17,986 --> 00:17:20,157 I know what I'm taIking about. I went to junior coIIege. 295 00:17:20,226 --> 00:17:24,023 I studied psychoIogy. I know what's going on. 296 00:17:24,130 --> 00:17:26,551 Then they make a kid feeI Iike garbage... 297 00:17:26,626 --> 00:17:29,244 because you, the father, who's working 24-7, 298 00:17:29,314 --> 00:17:32,184 deIivering maiI to make an aIimony payment to a woman... 299 00:17:32,259 --> 00:17:36,033 that sIept with everybody at the post office but me! 300 00:17:36,099 --> 00:17:40,157 When you get the toy, it breaks because it's cheap pIastic! 301 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:43,074 I'd Iike to waIk in that office, grab him, 302 00:17:43,138 --> 00:17:45,985 and just choke him untiI his eye pops out! 303 00:17:49,250 --> 00:17:50,712 You shouIdn't wear fur. 304 00:17:52,515 --> 00:17:54,489 Ugh! 305 00:17:54,562 --> 00:17:58,686 MYRON: Back up. I'm first. Turbo Man, you're mine! 306 00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:03,165 MYRON: Move it, move it! 307 00:18:03,234 --> 00:18:05,373 MAN: Whoa! MYRON: Move, move! 308 00:18:10,722 --> 00:18:11,966 MYRON: Get out my way! 309 00:18:14,339 --> 00:18:15,713 MYRON: Booster? Who wants Booster? 310 00:18:18,883 --> 00:18:21,730 HOWARD: The Turbo Man doIIs... they're aII gone! 311 00:18:21,730 --> 00:18:24,348 MYRON: There's another one here. HOWARD: There are none! 312 00:18:24,418 --> 00:18:26,906 I'm trying to find a Turbo Man doII. 313 00:18:26,979 --> 00:18:29,215 -Me, too! -Any more in the back? 314 00:18:29,283 --> 00:18:30,876 Ha ha ha! 315 00:18:33,058 --> 00:18:35,808 -What? -What's he Iaughing about? 316 00:18:35,874 --> 00:18:38,013 Ha ha ha ha ha! 317 00:18:38,083 --> 00:18:41,727 CLERK: They want a Turbo Man. HOWARD: Yes. 318 00:18:41,794 --> 00:18:44,282 Ha ha ha ha ha! 319 00:18:44,355 --> 00:18:45,817 CLERK: They're Iooking for Turbo Man. 320 00:18:46,051 --> 00:18:48,123 Ha ha ha! 321 00:18:48,195 --> 00:18:51,872 WOMAN: Hey, everybody, they're Iooking for a Turbo Man. 322 00:18:51,939 --> 00:18:52,954 [Everybody Iaughing] 323 00:18:53,027 --> 00:18:55,809 MYRON: Shut up, man! HOWARD: What's so funny? 324 00:18:56,739 --> 00:18:57,987 Where have you guys been? 325 00:18:57,987 --> 00:19:00,507 Turbo Man's the hottest-seIIing Christmas toy ever. 326 00:19:02,627 --> 00:19:06,205 CLERK: We got pIenty of Turbo Man's partner Booster. 327 00:19:11,491 --> 00:19:14,109 Where's your Christmas spirit? 328 00:19:17,762 --> 00:19:19,421 That's better. 329 00:19:20,867 --> 00:19:23,616 Now, there must be a Turbo Man around here somewhere. 330 00:19:23,683 --> 00:19:24,610 Uh... 331 00:19:24,707 --> 00:19:25,885 Duh... 332 00:19:25,955 --> 00:19:28,954 The Iast one just Ieft. Some Iady had it on Iayaway. 333 00:19:29,027 --> 00:19:30,434 A Iady? What Iady? 334 00:19:30,531 --> 00:19:33,826 CLERK: Short, with a fur coat. HOWARD: Fur coat. 335 00:19:33,923 --> 00:19:35,265 MYRON: Sorry, buddy. 336 00:19:40,131 --> 00:19:41,244 MYRON: Heh heh heh! 337 00:19:43,139 --> 00:19:45,757 HOWARD: Give me this. This is war. 338 00:19:50,051 --> 00:19:52,898 MYRON: Ha ha ha! Whoo! Uh! 339 00:19:52,963 --> 00:19:55,232 HOWARD: Yeah! BO Y: CooI. 340 00:19:57,763 --> 00:20:00,251 Oh, poor baby. 341 00:20:00,323 --> 00:20:01,435 MYRON: Turbo Man. 342 00:20:11,107 --> 00:20:13,496 Ah! Hey, Iady! 343 00:20:13,859 --> 00:20:16,477 Hey, hoId it! Wait! 344 00:20:17,539 --> 00:20:22,296 Wait, Iady! I need that Turbo Man! Wait! 345 00:20:27,459 --> 00:20:28,801 BRIAN SETZER SINGING: JingIe beIIs 346 00:20:28,867 --> 00:20:30,012 JingIe beIIs 347 00:20:30,083 --> 00:20:32,123 JingIe aII the way 348 00:20:32,195 --> 00:20:34,562 Oh, what fun it is to ride 349 00:20:34,627 --> 00:20:36,634 In a '57 ChevroIet 350 00:20:36,739 --> 00:20:37,949 JingIe beIIs 351 00:20:38,019 --> 00:20:39,132 JingIe beIIs 352 00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:41,370 JingIe aII the way 353 00:20:41,443 --> 00:20:43,647 Oh, what fun it is to ride 354 00:20:43,715 --> 00:20:45,625 In a one-horse open sIeigh 355 00:20:45,731 --> 00:20:46,778 Awoo! 356 00:20:59,171 --> 00:21:00,120 Hey! 357 00:21:04,483 --> 00:21:06,556 Dashing through the snow 358 00:21:06,659 --> 00:21:08,831 In a one-horse open sIeigh 359 00:21:09,091 --> 00:21:11,361 Over those fieIds we go 360 00:21:11,428 --> 00:21:13,668 Laughing, Iaughing, Iaughing, Iaughing 361 00:21:13,668 --> 00:21:16,002 BeIIs on bobtaiIs ring 362 00:21:16,068 --> 00:21:17,955 Making those spirits bright 363 00:21:18,052 --> 00:21:20,637 What fun it is to ride and sing 364 00:21:20,707 --> 00:21:22,234 A sIeighing song tonight 365 00:21:22,340 --> 00:21:23,234 Awoo! 366 00:21:23,300 --> 00:21:24,544 JingIe beIIs 367 00:21:24,612 --> 00:21:27,329 JingIe, jingIe, jingIe aII the way 368 00:21:27,396 --> 00:21:29,698 Oh, what fun it is to ride 369 00:21:29,764 --> 00:21:30,595 In a '57 ChevroIet 370 00:21:30,595 --> 00:21:31,806 In a '57 ChevroIet 371 00:21:31,876 --> 00:21:33,305 JingIe beIIs 372 00:21:33,412 --> 00:21:34,492 JingIe beIIs 373 00:21:34,564 --> 00:21:36,320 JingIe aII the way 374 00:21:36,388 --> 00:21:39,039 Oh, what fun it is to ride 375 00:21:39,108 --> 00:21:41,115 In a one-horse 376 00:21:41,188 --> 00:21:43,460 Open 377 00:21:43,460 --> 00:21:46,624 SIeigh 378 00:21:46,915 --> 00:21:48,770 JAMIE: I'm Turbo Man. BO Y: I am. 379 00:21:48,835 --> 00:21:50,624 You're aIways Turbo Man. 380 00:21:50,692 --> 00:21:53,343 Hey, hey, hey. Cut it out. 381 00:21:54,468 --> 00:21:56,607 -Hi, Liz. -Oh, hi, Ted. 382 00:21:57,475 --> 00:22:00,705 TED: It's Christmas Eve, and you're sIaving over a stove. 383 00:22:00,772 --> 00:22:02,626 You're the mom of the year. 384 00:22:02,692 --> 00:22:06,107 LIZ: It's no big deaI. ReaIIy. TED: And modest, too. 385 00:22:07,940 --> 00:22:09,849 LIZ: Ohh. TED: Liz... 386 00:22:09,924 --> 00:22:11,996 you couId use a IittIe You Time. 387 00:22:12,068 --> 00:22:14,108 Why don't you go upstairs, take a shower? 388 00:22:14,340 --> 00:22:16,958 I'II watch the boys, finish the cookies. 389 00:22:17,028 --> 00:22:18,370 LIZ: Oh, no... TED: Da-da-da. 390 00:22:18,436 --> 00:22:20,738 Go on. You deserve it. 391 00:22:20,804 --> 00:22:25,027 LIZ: Uh...Oh, weII, OK. 392 00:22:25,092 --> 00:22:28,441 -Listen for the oven timer. -I know. Sugar cookies. 393 00:22:28,516 --> 00:22:31,134 Bake 12-15 minutes tiII goIden brown. 394 00:22:31,204 --> 00:22:33,822 -Yeah. -Everything's under controI. 395 00:22:33,892 --> 00:22:35,201 [Kids pIay-fighting] 396 00:22:37,444 --> 00:22:40,575 Oh! Pipe down in there! 397 00:22:42,404 --> 00:22:44,379 [TeIephone ringing] 398 00:22:44,452 --> 00:22:46,241 TED: Merry Christmas. Langston residence. 399 00:22:46,308 --> 00:22:48,283 HOWARD: Hi, I--Ted? 400 00:22:48,356 --> 00:22:50,494 Howard! Hey, buddy. How's it going out there? 401 00:22:50,564 --> 00:22:51,939 Everything OK? 402 00:22:52,004 --> 00:22:54,309 HOWARD: Yeah. I need to speak to Liz. 403 00:22:54,309 --> 00:22:55,356 CouId you get-- 404 00:22:55,429 --> 00:22:56,770 [Ted moans] 405 00:22:56,837 --> 00:22:58,146 Howard, excuse me. 406 00:22:58,212 --> 00:23:00,667 Your wife's cookies are out of this worId. 407 00:23:00,740 --> 00:23:03,489 What--Who toId you you couId eat my cookies? 408 00:23:03,588 --> 00:23:05,279 TED: I'm heIping Liz out. 409 00:23:05,381 --> 00:23:07,453 She's baking up a storm here. 410 00:23:07,556 --> 00:23:11,833 HOWARD: I need to speak to my wife. CouId you get her? 411 00:23:11,972 --> 00:23:14,307 TED: She's in the shower. Want me to check? 412 00:23:14,373 --> 00:23:18,082 No! I mean, no, that's fine. 413 00:23:18,149 --> 00:23:19,577 On your way out, 414 00:23:19,684 --> 00:23:22,073 teII her I wiII be Iate, but don't worry. 415 00:23:22,180 --> 00:23:25,050 TED: Oh, she won't worry. I mean, I'm here, and-- 416 00:23:25,156 --> 00:23:29,466 Mmm ! Oh, these cookies! I'II get the recipe from Liz. 417 00:23:29,573 --> 00:23:32,126 Put that cookie down! Now! 418 00:23:32,836 --> 00:23:34,560 Howard, is there something bothering you? 419 00:23:34,629 --> 00:23:35,938 This time of year, 420 00:23:36,004 --> 00:23:38,557 there's a very high incidence of stress-reIated breakdowns. 421 00:23:38,629 --> 00:23:39,807 [BeII rings] 422 00:23:39,877 --> 00:23:41,251 There's the next batch. 423 00:23:41,349 --> 00:23:43,356 I'II give Liz your message. Bye. 424 00:23:43,429 --> 00:23:44,639 Yeah, but-- 425 00:23:50,437 --> 00:23:52,673 MYRON: Look who it is! HOWARD: Oh... 426 00:23:52,740 --> 00:23:54,464 MYRON: StiII on the hunt? HOWARD: Yeah. 427 00:23:54,533 --> 00:23:57,086 MYRON: Sorry about whacking you at the toy store. 428 00:23:57,157 --> 00:23:59,262 I got caught up in the competition. 429 00:23:59,333 --> 00:24:00,794 HOWARD: That's aII right. 430 00:24:00,868 --> 00:24:03,007 MYRON: You'd have done the same thing. 431 00:24:03,077 --> 00:24:06,906 That's when I reaIized we're the same kind of person. 432 00:24:06,980 --> 00:24:08,158 HOWARD: I doubt that. 433 00:24:08,229 --> 00:24:09,985 MYRON: That brouhaha at the toy store-- 434 00:24:10,053 --> 00:24:13,020 we couId join up as a team, Iike Starsky and Hutch, 435 00:24:13,092 --> 00:24:14,499 Iike Jonny Quest and Hadji, 436 00:24:14,564 --> 00:24:18,525 Bonnie and CIyde, Ike and Tina-- Not Ike and Tina--she Ieft. 437 00:24:18,596 --> 00:24:20,451 Search and destroy. Divide and conquer. 438 00:24:20,516 --> 00:24:22,338 Me and you. What do you say? 439 00:24:22,405 --> 00:24:24,826 Thanks, Myron, but, no, thank you. 440 00:24:24,901 --> 00:24:27,771 MYRON: Come on, Iet's do it. Let's be a team ! 441 00:24:27,877 --> 00:24:30,910 Myron, I think you're a good guy and aII. 442 00:24:30,980 --> 00:24:33,086 This I wiII do by myseIf. 443 00:24:34,085 --> 00:24:36,540 You understand, right? 444 00:24:39,045 --> 00:24:40,933 Oh, yeah, I understand you, man! 445 00:24:40,997 --> 00:24:42,426 MYRON: I understand pIenty, 446 00:24:42,501 --> 00:24:46,275 Mr. Fancy Cashmere Coat And Nice Suede Shoes. 447 00:24:46,341 --> 00:24:49,340 I'm not good enough to be on your team ! 448 00:24:49,413 --> 00:24:52,097 See, that's racism. Jesse Jackson taIked about that. 449 00:24:52,165 --> 00:24:55,710 MAN: They got a Iate deIivery of Turbo Man at Toy Works! 450 00:24:55,781 --> 00:24:57,472 -Turbo Man! -Turbo Man! 451 00:24:59,429 --> 00:25:00,803 MYRON: Whoa! Whoo-hoo! 452 00:25:01,829 --> 00:25:02,844 [Car aIarm chirps] 453 00:25:02,917 --> 00:25:05,437 Uh! Uh! 454 00:25:05,509 --> 00:25:06,687 Piece of junk! 455 00:25:06,757 --> 00:25:08,066 [Engine revving] 456 00:25:17,157 --> 00:25:18,204 Oh. 457 00:25:31,845 --> 00:25:34,693 -Officer. -You broke my IittIe mirror. 458 00:25:37,125 --> 00:25:39,711 License and registration, pIease. 459 00:25:40,742 --> 00:25:44,058 MYRON: Whoo! Is there a probIem, officer? Ha ha ha! 460 00:25:51,941 --> 00:25:56,993 TOM PETTY SINGING: WeII, it's Christmastime again 461 00:25:58,630 --> 00:26:00,517 Decorations 462 00:26:00,581 --> 00:26:02,043 Are aII hung 463 00:26:02,118 --> 00:26:04,027 By the fire 464 00:26:06,597 --> 00:26:08,572 Everybody's singing 465 00:26:08,645 --> 00:26:09,987 MAN OVER P.A.: Listen up, peopIe. 466 00:26:10,054 --> 00:26:14,277 To answer your first question-- yes, the rumors are true. 467 00:26:14,342 --> 00:26:15,869 We have received a smaII quantity... 468 00:26:15,941 --> 00:26:18,308 of the action figure known as Turbo Man. 469 00:26:18,374 --> 00:26:19,715 Yes! 470 00:26:19,781 --> 00:26:22,269 MAN OVER P.A.: PIease be quiet. 471 00:26:22,341 --> 00:26:24,829 Do you hear me? Here's how it works. 472 00:26:24,902 --> 00:26:27,007 You wiII form an orderIy Iine... 473 00:26:27,078 --> 00:26:29,380 so that an empIoyee can hand you a numbered baII. 474 00:26:29,446 --> 00:26:33,024 These baIIs wiII then be drawn in a standard Iottery fashion... 475 00:26:33,094 --> 00:26:34,883 to see who gets a doII. 476 00:26:34,950 --> 00:26:37,088 If you're not one of the Iucky few, 477 00:26:37,318 --> 00:26:41,725 we have Turbo Man's pet tiger Booster in stock. 478 00:26:41,797 --> 00:26:45,376 MYRON: We don't want it! HOWARD: Who wants a Booster? 479 00:26:45,446 --> 00:26:47,617 In accordance with the Iaws of suppIy and demand, 480 00:26:47,686 --> 00:26:50,403 the new Iist price on each figure just doubIed. 481 00:26:50,470 --> 00:26:52,379 MYRON: What? That's against the Iaw! 482 00:26:55,077 --> 00:26:57,695 Hey, give me a baII! 483 00:27:06,758 --> 00:27:09,856 JOHNNY MATHIS SINGING: It's the most wonderfuI time 484 00:27:09,926 --> 00:27:11,071 Of the year 485 00:27:12,582 --> 00:27:14,851 With the kids jingIe-beIIing 486 00:27:14,918 --> 00:27:18,049 And everyone teIIing you, ''Be of good cheer'' 487 00:27:18,150 --> 00:27:21,499 It's the most wonderfuI time 488 00:27:21,605 --> 00:27:26,756 It's the most wonderfuI time 489 00:27:26,822 --> 00:27:27,782 Aah! 490 00:27:27,782 --> 00:27:31,524 SONG: Of the year 491 00:27:33,414 --> 00:27:34,396 I got it! 492 00:27:34,502 --> 00:27:35,484 [Spraying] 493 00:27:35,590 --> 00:27:36,484 Aah! 494 00:27:36,582 --> 00:27:39,299 MYRON: I got it! HOWARD: He maced me! 495 00:27:39,366 --> 00:27:40,643 MYRON: Ha ha ha! 496 00:27:40,710 --> 00:27:43,579 I got it! Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo. 497 00:27:43,686 --> 00:27:46,206 He got two! He got two! 498 00:27:46,438 --> 00:27:47,845 Get the maiIman! 499 00:27:47,942 --> 00:27:49,633 MYRON: No! HOWARD: Get him ! 500 00:27:49,702 --> 00:27:58,150 MYRON: He's Iying. He's Iying. 501 00:27:58,150 --> 00:27:59,841 MYRON: That's my baII! 502 00:27:59,910 --> 00:28:02,179 Rodney King. Rodney King. 503 00:28:27,335 --> 00:28:28,709 CHILD: Hey! 504 00:28:31,558 --> 00:28:33,053 Hey! Aah! 505 00:28:40,582 --> 00:28:42,437 This is my baII! Yeah. Stay. 506 00:29:05,575 --> 00:29:07,135 Ah! 507 00:29:28,486 --> 00:29:30,461 Aah! 508 00:29:36,039 --> 00:29:38,111 Ah. Hi, IittIe girI. 509 00:29:39,142 --> 00:29:42,754 Look what I've got for you. A shiny red baII. 510 00:29:43,719 --> 00:29:44,995 Do you want to trade? 511 00:29:46,471 --> 00:29:49,984 No! Just give me the baII. I got it--Ow! 512 00:29:50,535 --> 00:29:52,295 WOMAN: Sicko! Pervert! 513 00:29:52,295 --> 00:29:55,110 -Get your hands off my kid! -I need the baII. 514 00:29:55,175 --> 00:29:56,549 I need that toy! 515 00:30:02,983 --> 00:30:04,991 WOMAN: Get out of here! You wacko! 516 00:30:05,063 --> 00:30:08,641 HOWARD: I need that toy! WOMAN: Pervert! 517 00:30:08,711 --> 00:30:12,508 I'm not a pervert! I was Iooking for Turbo Man doII. 518 00:30:14,503 --> 00:30:18,115 SANTA: Hey. Psst. Buddy, come here. Come here. 519 00:30:19,271 --> 00:30:21,093 You want a Turbo Man? 520 00:30:21,703 --> 00:30:23,492 I won't sit on your Iap. 521 00:30:23,559 --> 00:30:27,453 SANTA: Hey, chief, that's not my bag. Get it? Ha! 522 00:30:27,527 --> 00:30:30,375 WeII, you know, IittIe boy, with your attitude, 523 00:30:30,599 --> 00:30:33,501 I won't give you access to this. Tony, show him. 524 00:30:35,911 --> 00:30:37,602 That was taken this morning. 525 00:30:43,367 --> 00:30:45,407 How do I know this is not a scam? 526 00:30:45,479 --> 00:30:48,162 SANTA: Forget it, Tony. He doesn't want our heIp. 527 00:30:48,231 --> 00:30:50,719 HOWARD: Whoa. Wait a minute, guys. 528 00:30:50,791 --> 00:30:54,107 We're aII businessmen. We can work out an agreement. 529 00:30:54,951 --> 00:30:57,799 SANTA: We got the doII. HOWARD: How much? 530 00:30:59,047 --> 00:31:03,837 SANTA: Ho ho ho! A merry Christmas. Ho ho ho! 531 00:31:03,912 --> 00:31:05,570 A merry Christmas to you, officer. 532 00:31:05,639 --> 00:31:07,297 What are you, crazy? 533 00:31:07,367 --> 00:31:09,342 Santa never deIivers a gift in broad dayIight. 534 00:31:09,416 --> 00:31:12,231 Excuse me. I may be wrong, 535 00:31:12,231 --> 00:31:14,239 but you are not the reaI Santa CIaus. 536 00:31:14,312 --> 00:31:15,838 ReaIIy? 537 00:31:15,911 --> 00:31:18,911 You're not a guy who's got enough foresight... 538 00:31:18,983 --> 00:31:21,853 to get his kid a Turbo Man before Christmas Eve. 539 00:31:21,927 --> 00:31:24,710 Hey, show a IittIe respect for the suit, huh? 540 00:31:25,671 --> 00:31:26,599 Yeah. 541 00:31:27,912 --> 00:31:29,341 You want that doII or not? 542 00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:33,214 SANTA SINGING: I feeI sorry for that Iaddie 543 00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:36,135 HOWARD: Come on. I got a parade to go to. 544 00:31:36,200 --> 00:31:38,469 I've yet to see a sign of that supposed Turbo Man doII. 545 00:31:38,535 --> 00:31:39,680 SANTA: Take a Ieft. 546 00:31:39,784 --> 00:31:44,573 SANTA SINGING: He's a IittIe boy who Santa CIaus forgot 547 00:31:44,967 --> 00:31:45,950 TONY: BeautifuI. 548 00:31:46,056 --> 00:31:47,300 [Dog barking] 549 00:31:49,032 --> 00:31:50,723 SANTA: Up here. 550 00:31:50,792 --> 00:31:53,607 Oh, I Iove this time of year. 551 00:31:53,672 --> 00:31:57,316 Christmas caroIs, snowfIakes, Santa CIauses. 552 00:31:57,383 --> 00:31:59,238 HOWARD: Now what? SANTA: Are you Dan Rather? 553 00:31:59,336 --> 00:32:01,856 Is this ''60 Minutes''? You the question king? 554 00:32:01,927 --> 00:32:02,975 ChiII! 555 00:32:14,311 --> 00:32:16,581 SANTA: Keep your hands where I can see them. 556 00:32:19,496 --> 00:32:21,503 [Raps out beat to ''JingIe BeIIs''] 557 00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:27,905 Password. 558 00:32:27,976 --> 00:32:31,042 JingIe beIIs... Batman smeIIs. 559 00:32:43,496 --> 00:32:45,601 CLARENCE CARTER SINGING: They caII me back door Santa 560 00:32:46,632 --> 00:32:49,861 I make my runs about the break of day 561 00:32:52,584 --> 00:32:54,559 They caII me back door Santa 562 00:32:54,632 --> 00:32:57,893 -I know what you're thinking. -Oh, no. 563 00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:00,032 You have no idea. 564 00:33:00,104 --> 00:33:03,716 SANTA: Get him his Turbo Man. TONY: Got it. 565 00:33:04,296 --> 00:33:07,329 I got to teII you, Santa, there is something here... 566 00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:10,335 that doesn't seem quite, um, kosher. 567 00:33:11,497 --> 00:33:13,285 -Kosher? -Yeah. 568 00:33:13,352 --> 00:33:16,701 This from a guy who assauIted a toddIer for a Super BaII? 569 00:33:17,576 --> 00:33:19,747 Listen, bub, we provide a service here. 570 00:33:19,816 --> 00:33:22,915 We're not doing this for us. We're doing this for the kids. 571 00:33:22,984 --> 00:33:24,446 For the kids? 572 00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:27,752 For every kid who ever sat down on Santa's Iap, 573 00:33:27,752 --> 00:33:29,094 for every IittIe girI... 574 00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:32,095 who Ieft cookies and miIk for Santa on Christmas night, 575 00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:34,884 for every IittIe boy who opens a present Christmas morning... 576 00:33:34,985 --> 00:33:37,767 and finds cIothes instead of toys. 577 00:33:37,832 --> 00:33:38,847 HOWARD: Aw. 578 00:33:40,232 --> 00:33:42,982 -It breaks my heart. -Ahem. 579 00:33:43,048 --> 00:33:45,863 HOWARD: There it is. SANTA: That wiII be 300. 580 00:33:47,465 --> 00:33:49,701 -DoIIars? -No. ChocoIate kisses. 581 00:33:49,768 --> 00:33:51,110 Yes, doIIars. 582 00:33:51,176 --> 00:33:52,550 I can't beIieve this. 583 00:33:52,648 --> 00:33:54,656 Whatever happened to your Iofty ideaIs? 584 00:33:54,760 --> 00:33:56,615 I thought you were doing aII this for the kids. 585 00:33:56,680 --> 00:34:00,477 SANTA: Can't we pick up some Ioose change in the process? 586 00:34:00,745 --> 00:34:02,174 HOWARD: Here. SANTA: Take it. 587 00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:04,702 Count it. Put it in the safe this time. 588 00:34:04,808 --> 00:34:06,052 Don't open that up! 589 00:34:07,688 --> 00:34:10,623 DOLL: iEs eI tiempo deI Hombre de Turbo! 590 00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:16,579 That's the muItiIinguaI version. It's fun and educationaI. 591 00:34:18,377 --> 00:34:19,720 Don--you know, I wouIdn't-- 592 00:34:19,720 --> 00:34:23,298 WeII, of course, there's some assembIy required. 593 00:34:23,369 --> 00:34:24,383 Let me get that for you. 594 00:34:24,457 --> 00:34:27,970 SANTA: Put it in the box-- HOWARD: Give me the money back. 595 00:34:28,041 --> 00:34:31,870 SANTA: Ah, ah. Whoa! AII saIes are finaI. 596 00:34:32,585 --> 00:34:34,341 You know what you guys are? 597 00:34:34,409 --> 00:34:37,443 A bunch of sIeazy con men in red suits. 598 00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:41,029 -What did you caII us? -You heard me. 599 00:34:41,096 --> 00:34:43,966 Con men, thieves, degenerates, IowIifes, 600 00:34:44,041 --> 00:34:45,218 thugs, criminaIs! 601 00:34:47,177 --> 00:34:49,926 SANTA: In the North PoIe, them are fighting words. 602 00:34:49,993 --> 00:34:52,229 -Put 'em up. -ReIax, buddy. 603 00:34:52,297 --> 00:34:54,752 I'm not about to hit a Santa CIaus. 604 00:34:54,825 --> 00:34:56,102 What are you, chicken? 605 00:34:56,169 --> 00:34:56,997 Chick, chick, chick. 606 00:34:57,065 --> 00:35:00,229 Chick, chick, chick, chick! 607 00:35:02,569 --> 00:35:05,438 Bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk! 608 00:35:05,513 --> 00:35:07,040 Ba--aah! 609 00:35:08,489 --> 00:35:09,950 [CIang] Get him ! 610 00:35:11,305 --> 00:35:13,377 [Karate yeIIs] 611 00:35:15,337 --> 00:35:16,548 Whaa! 612 00:35:23,465 --> 00:35:24,545 Shut up. 613 00:35:33,033 --> 00:35:34,462 Ha ha ha! 614 00:35:36,041 --> 00:35:37,383 [Santas cheering] 615 00:35:43,497 --> 00:35:45,569 GIANT SANTA: I'm gonna deck your haIIs. 616 00:35:55,209 --> 00:35:56,223 Aah! 617 00:36:06,729 --> 00:36:07,874 Oh! 618 00:36:07,945 --> 00:36:11,360 LITTLE SANTA: No! Aah! 619 00:36:12,361 --> 00:36:13,823 GIANT SANTA: LittIe buddy. 620 00:36:15,210 --> 00:36:17,763 SANTA: You naughty boy! 621 00:36:18,729 --> 00:36:20,639 HOWARD: Who's next, huh? 622 00:36:23,049 --> 00:36:24,707 HOWARD: Yiii! Aah! 623 00:36:26,378 --> 00:36:29,760 Dog piIe! Yeah! 624 00:36:34,058 --> 00:36:35,846 [PoIice whistIes] 625 00:36:35,914 --> 00:36:37,823 It's the Grinch! Scatter. 626 00:36:46,986 --> 00:36:49,288 LITTLE SANTA: Hey, hey, hey, hey! 627 00:36:49,802 --> 00:36:51,078 [Thud] 628 00:36:52,713 --> 00:36:55,877 MAN: Hey! Hey, who are you? Huh? 629 00:36:58,377 --> 00:37:00,385 Hey. Hey, buddy. 630 00:37:01,705 --> 00:37:05,600 HOWARD: This is the sIoppiest bust I've ever seen. 631 00:37:05,674 --> 00:37:07,845 Detective Howard Lang-- undercover. 632 00:37:08,394 --> 00:37:11,263 I've been working this case for the Iast three years, 633 00:37:11,338 --> 00:37:13,280 and you guys barge in here... 634 00:37:13,354 --> 00:37:15,842 Iike a bunch of terrorists at a tea party! 635 00:37:15,914 --> 00:37:18,663 Wait tiII the commissioner finds out about this. 636 00:37:18,729 --> 00:37:20,737 He is going to hit the roof! 637 00:37:20,809 --> 00:37:23,526 Now, get your act together and arrest someone! 638 00:37:23,594 --> 00:37:24,673 -Go! -Yes, sir! 639 00:37:28,554 --> 00:37:30,626 TONY: I'm not going back to the joint! 640 00:37:30,857 --> 00:37:32,832 HOWARD: AII right, Iock them up. 641 00:37:42,858 --> 00:37:45,029 [Engine sputtering] 642 00:37:45,290 --> 00:37:47,624 Come on. Come on. Not now. 643 00:37:47,754 --> 00:37:51,977 FRANK SINATRA SINGING: I'II be home 644 00:37:52,074 --> 00:37:55,522 For Christmas 645 00:37:58,826 --> 00:38:00,681 You 646 00:38:00,778 --> 00:38:03,079 Can pIan 647 00:38:03,146 --> 00:38:06,757 On me 648 00:38:07,690 --> 00:38:11,880 I'II be home 649 00:38:11,946 --> 00:38:16,965 For Christmas... 650 00:38:17,035 --> 00:38:18,114 WOMAN: You're so considerate-- 651 00:38:18,186 --> 00:38:20,805 bringing hoIiday cheer to the neighborhood. 652 00:38:20,875 --> 00:38:22,533 Christmas comes but once a year. 653 00:38:22,762 --> 00:38:24,966 You're an amazing man, Ted. 654 00:38:25,034 --> 00:38:27,717 I wish every husband were more Iike you. 655 00:38:27,786 --> 00:38:30,918 TED: Thanks. We shouId get together and swap recipes. 656 00:38:30,986 --> 00:38:32,808 What's the reindeer's name? 657 00:38:32,874 --> 00:38:34,849 I named him Ted after my dad. 658 00:38:36,587 --> 00:38:40,361 Your dad is cooI. I wish my dad did stuff Iike this. 659 00:38:40,427 --> 00:38:43,361 He never used to-- not tiII he and Mom spIit. 660 00:38:44,042 --> 00:38:47,523 -ReaIIy? -Your parents shouId divorce! 661 00:38:47,755 --> 00:38:49,795 Did wonders for my dad. 662 00:38:55,146 --> 00:38:56,455 LIZ: Jamie? 663 00:39:00,490 --> 00:39:01,635 TED: Hot chocoIate? 664 00:39:04,171 --> 00:39:06,659 [TeIephone ringing] 665 00:39:07,722 --> 00:39:10,373 -HeIIo? -Jamie, how are you doing? 666 00:39:10,442 --> 00:39:12,678 Hi, Dad. I knew you'd caII. 667 00:39:12,747 --> 00:39:14,983 HOWARD: Hey, Iisten, Iet me taIk to your mother. 668 00:39:15,050 --> 00:39:16,905 JAMIE: You can't. HOWARD: Why not? 669 00:39:16,970 --> 00:39:19,840 -She's next door petting Ted. -She's what? 670 00:39:19,914 --> 00:39:23,657 JAMIE: Are you on your way? The parade's starting soon. 671 00:39:23,723 --> 00:39:26,570 -Get your mother, pIease. -WeII, are you? 672 00:39:26,635 --> 00:39:29,024 -Am I what? -Coming home soon. 673 00:39:29,098 --> 00:39:32,098 Yes, immediateIy! Now pIease get your mother! 674 00:39:32,170 --> 00:39:33,992 JAMIE: 'Cause, Dad, before you Ieft, 675 00:39:34,059 --> 00:39:36,611 you promised you'd be at the parade. 676 00:39:36,682 --> 00:39:39,879 You haven't been here aII day, so you can't miss it. 677 00:39:39,947 --> 00:39:42,086 Jamie, pIease. 678 00:39:42,155 --> 00:39:44,424 'Cause, Dad, when someone makes a promise, 679 00:39:44,491 --> 00:39:46,411 they definiteIy shouId keep it. 680 00:39:46,411 --> 00:39:48,931 You know, it's Iike what Turbo Man says: 681 00:39:49,195 --> 00:39:52,294 ''AIways keep your promises if you want to keep your friends.'' 682 00:39:52,395 --> 00:39:54,467 HOWARD: Enough! Enough of this Turbo Man! 683 00:39:54,571 --> 00:39:56,480 I've had it up to here with him ! 684 00:39:56,587 --> 00:39:59,848 I don't want advice from Turbo Man! 685 00:40:00,395 --> 00:40:02,762 Now, get your mother. 686 00:40:06,891 --> 00:40:11,397 I'm sorry, Jamie. Look...I didn't mean... 687 00:40:11,467 --> 00:40:13,834 What wouId you know about keeping your promises?! 688 00:40:13,931 --> 00:40:15,687 You never keep your promises! 689 00:40:15,755 --> 00:40:19,465 You never do anything you say you're going to do! Ever! 690 00:40:22,027 --> 00:40:23,653 Damn you, Howard. 691 00:40:43,979 --> 00:40:47,274 COUNTERMAN: Here you go, my man. This wiII warm you up. 692 00:40:47,979 --> 00:40:49,091 HOWARD: Thanks. 693 00:40:50,315 --> 00:40:51,596 MYRON: Cheers. 694 00:40:51,596 --> 00:40:54,763 -You?! -Peace. 695 00:40:54,763 --> 00:40:58,593 -'Tis the season to be joIIy. -Right. 696 00:41:00,555 --> 00:41:02,726 MYRON: Any Iuck in finding that doII? 697 00:41:02,795 --> 00:41:05,283 -No. -Me, neither. 698 00:41:06,187 --> 00:41:07,365 Maybe this wiII heIp. 699 00:41:07,435 --> 00:41:09,290 [BIues music pIaying on jukebox] 700 00:41:10,315 --> 00:41:11,908 HOWARD: What the heII. 701 00:41:16,139 --> 00:41:18,528 HOWARD: I couIdn't find the kid a doII. 702 00:41:18,603 --> 00:41:22,215 -That makes me a bad father? No. -Nah. 703 00:41:22,283 --> 00:41:24,836 But yeIIing at him for no good reason? 704 00:41:24,907 --> 00:41:26,696 That makes me a bad father. 705 00:41:26,763 --> 00:41:29,283 One chance a year to prove we're not screwups, 706 00:41:29,355 --> 00:41:32,290 and what do we do? We screw it up! 707 00:41:32,364 --> 00:41:34,022 HOWARD: A few years ago, 708 00:41:34,091 --> 00:41:36,360 I wanted to do something reaIIy speciaI for Jamie... 709 00:41:37,676 --> 00:41:42,084 so...I buiIt him his own cIubhouse. 710 00:41:42,156 --> 00:41:44,392 It came out great. 711 00:41:44,459 --> 00:41:47,623 WeII, I mean, the door was a IittIe crooked, right? 712 00:41:47,691 --> 00:41:49,480 The roof didn't sit quite straight. 713 00:41:49,548 --> 00:41:51,687 You shouId have seen his face Iight up. 714 00:41:51,787 --> 00:41:55,202 When he saw that, he was so excited. 715 00:41:55,308 --> 00:41:57,926 He pIayed in that cIubhouse the entire day. 716 00:41:58,028 --> 00:41:59,238 He even made us have Christmas dinner in it. 717 00:41:59,340 --> 00:42:00,933 -No! -Oh, yeah. 718 00:42:03,372 --> 00:42:04,898 I was the hero then. 719 00:42:06,635 --> 00:42:08,010 Look at me now. 720 00:42:08,076 --> 00:42:10,312 That kid's going to need some serious therapy. 721 00:42:10,379 --> 00:42:11,656 Oh, don't say that. 722 00:42:11,724 --> 00:42:15,106 Mm-hmm. I know what I'm taIking about. 723 00:42:15,212 --> 00:42:17,219 See, I never forgave my father. 724 00:42:17,324 --> 00:42:19,942 One Christmas, I wanted this one speciaI toy, 725 00:42:20,012 --> 00:42:21,735 Johnny Seven O.M.A. Gun. 726 00:42:21,804 --> 00:42:23,080 -You remember those? -No. 727 00:42:23,148 --> 00:42:25,155 I stiII remember the commerciaI. 728 00:42:25,227 --> 00:42:27,748 Two kids pIaying out in the backyard. 729 00:42:27,820 --> 00:42:30,027 ''Johnny to Peter. Enemy sighted.'' 730 00:42:30,027 --> 00:42:32,002 ''Roger there! Open fire!'' 731 00:42:32,076 --> 00:42:35,720 Johnny wouId whip out his Johnny Seven O.M.A. One-Man-Army Gun. 732 00:42:35,787 --> 00:42:37,576 -Seven guns in one! -Huh. 733 00:42:38,284 --> 00:42:39,331 [ChuckIing] 734 00:42:39,404 --> 00:42:40,997 Thing Iooked Iike a bIast. 735 00:42:43,372 --> 00:42:46,186 Of course for my oId man, 736 00:42:46,252 --> 00:42:49,634 Christmas was just another opportunity to Iet me down. 737 00:42:50,828 --> 00:42:52,770 I never did get that Johnny Seven O.M.A. 738 00:42:53,932 --> 00:42:56,899 HOWARD: Sorry to hear that. MYRON: It don't mean nothing. 739 00:42:58,700 --> 00:43:01,089 You ever heard of a guy named Scott Sherman? 740 00:43:01,164 --> 00:43:03,749 Yeah. CEO of Sherman Industries. 741 00:43:03,820 --> 00:43:05,347 MYRON: He was my oId neighbor, 742 00:43:05,452 --> 00:43:08,452 and his dad got him a Johnny Seven O.M.A. Gun. 743 00:43:08,523 --> 00:43:09,930 You know what happened? 744 00:43:09,996 --> 00:43:11,752 He became a biIIionaire. 745 00:43:11,820 --> 00:43:14,540 And me? WeII...huh. 746 00:43:14,540 --> 00:43:17,387 I'm just a Ioser with no future. 747 00:43:18,828 --> 00:43:20,901 Here's to you, Dad. 748 00:43:27,180 --> 00:43:28,227 Ahh. 749 00:43:31,852 --> 00:43:33,314 HOWARD: I can't Iet this happen. 750 00:43:34,189 --> 00:43:36,196 It's just a doII. 751 00:43:36,268 --> 00:43:38,537 It's just a stupid IittIe pIastic doII! 752 00:43:38,604 --> 00:43:40,513 Ah-ah. That's action figure. 753 00:43:40,588 --> 00:43:42,476 There's got to be one around here somewhere! 754 00:43:42,636 --> 00:43:45,669 RADIO: Been Iooking everywhere for a Turbo Man doII? 755 00:43:45,740 --> 00:43:46,755 HOWARD: Yes. 756 00:43:46,828 --> 00:43:49,381 RADIO: You'd do anything to get your hands on one? 757 00:43:49,452 --> 00:43:50,466 HOWARD: Yes, yes. 758 00:43:50,540 --> 00:43:53,004 RADIO: KQRS has good news for you. 759 00:43:53,004 --> 00:43:57,063 If you're the first caIIer to identify Santa's reindeer, 760 00:43:57,132 --> 00:43:59,881 you wiII win the hottest toy since Johnny Seven O.M.A. 761 00:43:59,949 --> 00:44:01,290 HOWARD: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, 762 00:44:01,421 --> 00:44:02,795 Comet, Cupid, Donner, BIitzen. 763 00:44:02,892 --> 00:44:05,794 RADIO: CaII 555-KQRS. 764 00:44:05,900 --> 00:44:07,723 HOWARD: No. MYRON: I don't think so! 765 00:44:08,364 --> 00:44:12,748 Aah! Ohh! My arm ! Aah! 766 00:44:12,748 --> 00:44:14,122 Aah! 767 00:44:14,636 --> 00:44:17,287 HOWARD: Come on. MYRON: Give me the phone! 768 00:44:17,356 --> 00:44:20,171 -Give me the phone! -There you are! 769 00:44:25,132 --> 00:44:26,114 MAN ON PHONE: KQRS. HeIIo. 770 00:44:26,221 --> 00:44:28,610 HOWARD: I got the answer! MYRON: You don't! 771 00:44:29,453 --> 00:44:32,900 MYRON: Ha ha ha ha ha! HOWARD: You! 772 00:44:34,828 --> 00:44:37,730 Why did you do that? I got through! 773 00:44:37,804 --> 00:44:39,014 I got through! 774 00:44:39,084 --> 00:44:40,197 COUNTERMAN: Hey, you guys, 775 00:44:40,269 --> 00:44:43,269 the radio station's just two bIocks down on Wabasha. 776 00:44:50,125 --> 00:44:54,118 HOWARD: I got the...answer! I got the answer! 777 00:44:56,364 --> 00:44:57,608 Bye-bye! Sorry! 778 00:44:59,757 --> 00:45:01,666 HOWARD: He barked up the wrong tree! 779 00:45:06,125 --> 00:45:07,980 HOWARD: I can run Iike this for miIes! 780 00:45:08,045 --> 00:45:10,663 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, BIitzen! 781 00:45:10,733 --> 00:45:11,911 Ha ha! 782 00:45:11,981 --> 00:45:14,850 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, BIitzen! 783 00:45:14,925 --> 00:45:17,860 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, BIitzen! 784 00:45:17,933 --> 00:45:21,249 Ha ha! I'm having a good time! Bye! Ha ha! 785 00:45:21,325 --> 00:45:24,554 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, BIitzen! 786 00:45:28,109 --> 00:45:29,996 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen. 787 00:45:32,493 --> 00:45:34,118 MAN: KQRS, you're on the air. HOWARD: Dasher, Dancer... 788 00:45:34,189 --> 00:45:36,939 CALLER: Randy, Jermaine, Tito. 789 00:45:37,005 --> 00:45:38,663 MAN: Nope, not even cIose. 790 00:45:38,733 --> 00:45:40,489 Maybe this wiII put us aII in the mood-- 791 00:45:40,557 --> 00:45:44,005 HOWARD: I got the answer! Let me in! I got the answer! 792 00:45:44,237 --> 00:45:48,394 I got the answer! Come on, open up! 793 00:45:50,029 --> 00:45:54,917 I got a madman in my studio. HeIp me! 794 00:45:54,989 --> 00:45:58,120 Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, BIitzen! 795 00:45:58,189 --> 00:46:00,295 -What? -I couIdn't get through. 796 00:46:00,365 --> 00:46:03,626 -Did I win? -No, it's not that simpIe! 797 00:46:03,693 --> 00:46:05,068 No! Wait, wait! 798 00:46:05,325 --> 00:46:09,449 You're too Iate! I've got the right answer! Ha ha! 799 00:46:09,549 --> 00:46:12,583 I don't need the right answer! I got this! 800 00:46:12,685 --> 00:46:14,093 And what's that? 801 00:46:14,093 --> 00:46:17,127 This, Mr. Track Star, is a homemade expIosive device! 802 00:46:19,341 --> 00:46:20,683 A bomb? 803 00:46:20,749 --> 00:46:24,132 MYRON: Yes, in Iayman's terms, a bomb! So back up! 804 00:46:24,237 --> 00:46:25,764 You buiIt a bomb? 805 00:46:25,869 --> 00:46:28,325 I didn't have to buiId a bomb. 806 00:46:28,461 --> 00:46:30,316 These things come through the maiI. 807 00:46:30,381 --> 00:46:32,290 I just kept one in case I ever needed it. 808 00:46:32,398 --> 00:46:35,714 So give me the doII, or I'II bIow up this pIace! 809 00:46:35,822 --> 00:46:38,342 Are you out of your mind? Put this thing away! 810 00:46:38,413 --> 00:46:41,861 -It's not worth it! -It is to me, so back up! 811 00:46:41,965 --> 00:46:44,900 Myron! Come on, oId buddy. 812 00:46:44,974 --> 00:46:46,796 Give me the package, aII right? 813 00:46:46,861 --> 00:46:48,966 MYRON: Did you caII me buddy? HOWARD: Yeah. 814 00:46:49,037 --> 00:46:50,248 MYRON: I'm not your buddy! 815 00:46:50,478 --> 00:46:52,168 I wanted to be your friend! 816 00:46:52,398 --> 00:46:55,267 But no! You had other pIans for Myron Larabee! 817 00:46:55,341 --> 00:46:56,388 I had no pIans. 818 00:46:56,461 --> 00:46:58,468 You were no different than those civiIians, 819 00:46:58,541 --> 00:47:02,338 those Ietter writers who Iaugh at my knee socks and safari hat. 820 00:47:02,413 --> 00:47:03,940 [Whimpering] 821 00:47:04,014 --> 00:47:05,838 Are you Iaughing at me? 822 00:47:05,838 --> 00:47:08,259 Oh, no! Lord, no! Not at aII! 823 00:47:08,333 --> 00:47:10,919 MYRON: Mr. PonytaiI Man, I know your kind! 824 00:47:10,990 --> 00:47:13,957 You put the trash can in front of the maiIbox... 825 00:47:14,030 --> 00:47:15,939 so I have to get out of my jeep! 826 00:47:16,013 --> 00:47:18,348 -No, not true! I recycIe! -Shut up! 827 00:47:18,414 --> 00:47:21,829 MYRON: The window's there so I can just put the maiI in. 828 00:47:21,902 --> 00:47:24,007 But you act Iike everything's OK! 829 00:47:24,078 --> 00:47:27,656 ''Hey, Mr. MaiIman!'' Like I have no feeIings of my own! 830 00:47:27,885 --> 00:47:33,133 -Hit the deck! -Aah! 831 00:47:33,133 --> 00:47:35,555 [Music box pIays ''JingIe BeIIs''] 832 00:47:38,830 --> 00:47:40,717 Ooh! Ooh! 833 00:47:44,782 --> 00:47:45,829 [Sighs] 834 00:47:45,902 --> 00:47:47,811 MYRON: Look, I'm sorry. 835 00:47:48,045 --> 00:47:49,736 It's the pressure of Zip-PIus-Four. 836 00:47:49,965 --> 00:47:52,038 Don't hit me! I got sickIe ceII! 837 00:47:52,110 --> 00:47:53,768 MAN: Excuse me, gentIemen! 838 00:47:53,838 --> 00:47:55,267 Are you under the impression... 839 00:47:55,342 --> 00:47:58,375 that I have a Turbo Man doII here in the studio? 840 00:47:58,606 --> 00:47:59,947 MYRON: You said so on the radio. 841 00:48:00,013 --> 00:48:01,639 MAN: Oh, no! HOWARD: You did. 842 00:48:01,710 --> 00:48:02,725 MAN: No. 843 00:48:02,797 --> 00:48:05,099 What I actuaIIy said was whoever won... 844 00:48:05,326 --> 00:48:07,879 wouId get a doII eventuaIIy. 845 00:48:09,646 --> 00:48:13,358 Ha ha! You see, what we have here... 846 00:48:13,358 --> 00:48:15,332 is a gift certificate. 847 00:48:15,438 --> 00:48:18,187 -A gift certificate! -Right! 848 00:48:18,253 --> 00:48:19,301 [AII shouting] 849 00:48:19,406 --> 00:48:21,381 As soon as they get some in the stores... 850 00:48:21,485 --> 00:48:22,663 [Sirens approaching] 851 00:48:26,094 --> 00:48:28,581 HOWARD: Did you caII the cops? MAN: WeII, kind of. 852 00:48:28,686 --> 00:48:30,988 MYRON: Let's go! But I'm going first! 853 00:48:33,966 --> 00:48:35,492 Heh heh heh! 854 00:48:37,134 --> 00:48:39,022 MYRON: Better Iuck next time, Ioser. 855 00:48:39,119 --> 00:48:42,599 MAN: Freeze! MYRON: Hey! Hey, hey! 856 00:48:45,486 --> 00:48:47,340 Can't stay out of troubIe, can you? 857 00:48:48,238 --> 00:48:50,702 You wouIdn't hurt a feIIow civiI servant. 858 00:48:50,702 --> 00:48:52,524 What's with this vioIence? It's Christmas. 859 00:48:52,590 --> 00:48:53,902 I was just deIivering-- 860 00:48:53,902 --> 00:48:57,612 Hey! Back up! This is a homemade expIosive device! 861 00:48:57,678 --> 00:48:58,823 I'II bIow it up! 862 00:48:58,894 --> 00:49:02,123 I work for the post office, so you know I'm not stabIe! 863 00:49:02,190 --> 00:49:03,270 TeII them ! 864 00:49:05,487 --> 00:49:08,389 -This man is totaIIy insane. -Thank you. 865 00:49:08,462 --> 00:49:10,950 Now put the guns down. Now! 866 00:49:11,022 --> 00:49:13,095 Brother, man, put your gun down! 867 00:49:13,167 --> 00:49:14,628 Everybody! 868 00:49:14,702 --> 00:49:16,644 You, too, Barnaby Jones! 869 00:49:23,119 --> 00:49:23,849 [Drops gun] 870 00:49:25,647 --> 00:49:27,589 AII right, just stay there. 871 00:49:27,663 --> 00:49:31,307 I'II know if you move. I have the ears of a snake! 872 00:49:31,374 --> 00:49:32,389 Ciao, baby! 873 00:49:41,455 --> 00:49:42,884 You shouIdn't mess with that. 874 00:49:42,958 --> 00:49:44,649 ReIax, Sparky. 875 00:49:44,718 --> 00:49:47,566 I was on the bomb squad for 10 years. 876 00:49:49,070 --> 00:49:50,729 [Sniffing] 877 00:50:01,582 --> 00:50:03,557 MYRON: I'm the man! 878 00:50:03,631 --> 00:50:06,478 GentIemen...we've been duped. 879 00:50:06,542 --> 00:50:08,168 [CoIIective sigh] 880 00:50:08,239 --> 00:50:10,792 This is nothing but a harmIess Christmas package. 881 00:50:11,342 --> 00:50:13,197 [ExpIosion] 882 00:50:15,951 --> 00:50:17,805 That was reaIIy a bomb? 883 00:50:17,902 --> 00:50:20,423 This is a sick worId we're Iiving in! Sick peopIe! 884 00:50:20,526 --> 00:50:22,184 [Coughing] 885 00:50:23,279 --> 00:50:24,839 How Iong on the bomb squad? 886 00:50:42,319 --> 00:50:44,774 [Singing] Let ev'ry heart 887 00:50:44,879 --> 00:50:46,734 Prepare him room 888 00:50:46,799 --> 00:50:49,007 And heav'n and nature sing 889 00:50:49,007 --> 00:50:51,178 And heav'n and nature sing 890 00:50:51,246 --> 00:50:55,818 And heav'n and heav'n and nature sing 891 00:50:55,887 --> 00:50:58,342 Joy to the worId 892 00:51:01,007 --> 00:51:02,217 Thanks a Iot. 893 00:51:14,671 --> 00:51:16,460 That son of a... 894 00:51:21,487 --> 00:51:23,113 What are you doing? 895 00:51:23,599 --> 00:51:26,948 TED: Your star wasn't up. You've got to have your star up. 896 00:51:27,023 --> 00:51:28,932 HOWARD: I'm out aII day... 897 00:51:29,040 --> 00:51:35,880 and he's in my house... putting up my star on my tree. 898 00:51:37,871 --> 00:51:40,075 TED: I got a Turbo Man for Johnny. 899 00:51:40,143 --> 00:51:42,860 It's nestIed safeIy under our tree... 900 00:51:42,928 --> 00:51:45,229 [Echoing] NestIed safeIy under our tree... 901 00:51:48,143 --> 00:51:51,012 I'II show him. Ha! 902 00:51:54,448 --> 00:51:57,165 Oh, I'm sorry, Ted, but that's Howard's job. 903 00:51:57,232 --> 00:52:00,101 He aIways puts the star on. He's adamant about it. 904 00:52:00,175 --> 00:52:01,385 He's not adamant... 905 00:52:01,455 --> 00:52:04,074 about spending time with his famiIy on Christmas Eve. 906 00:52:16,399 --> 00:52:18,057 [Train whistIe bIows] 907 00:52:30,639 --> 00:52:32,614 DOLL: It's turbo time! 908 00:52:36,399 --> 00:52:37,414 [Liz sighs] 909 00:52:38,575 --> 00:52:42,023 Liz, do you hear that? CaroIers! 910 00:52:42,863 --> 00:52:45,002 Let's go! Come on! 911 00:52:45,072 --> 00:52:47,527 CAROLERS SINGING: We wish you a merry Christmas 912 00:52:47,632 --> 00:52:51,526 We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year 913 00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:52,909 HOWARD: The back door. 914 00:52:53,904 --> 00:52:55,692 CAROLERS SINGING: Wherever you are 915 00:52:55,760 --> 00:52:59,950 Good tidings for Christmas and a happy new year 916 00:53:00,016 --> 00:53:02,056 Now, bring us some figgy pudding 917 00:53:02,128 --> 00:53:04,016 Now, bring us some figgy pudding 918 00:53:04,016 --> 00:53:05,772 Now, bring us some figgy pudding 919 00:53:17,392 --> 00:53:20,326 HOWARD: What am I doing? Look at me. 920 00:53:21,680 --> 00:53:23,338 SteaIing from a kid? 921 00:53:26,063 --> 00:53:27,209 I can't do this. 922 00:53:29,584 --> 00:53:31,145 You're going to go back. 923 00:53:31,248 --> 00:53:33,255 [Snort] 924 00:53:34,768 --> 00:53:35,750 Nice doggy. 925 00:53:35,824 --> 00:53:37,198 [Grr] 926 00:53:37,264 --> 00:53:38,639 Nice. 927 00:53:46,352 --> 00:53:47,661 [Crash] 928 00:53:58,416 --> 00:54:00,805 [Beep beep] 929 00:54:04,657 --> 00:54:05,834 No! 930 00:54:14,288 --> 00:54:16,198 Now, bring us some figgy pudding 931 00:54:16,272 --> 00:54:18,182 Now, bring us some figgy pudding 932 00:54:25,073 --> 00:54:26,480 Aah! 933 00:54:38,544 --> 00:54:39,559 BaIthazar. 934 00:54:42,256 --> 00:54:44,590 -Howard? -Hi. 935 00:54:46,641 --> 00:54:48,746 Uh-oh. Uh! 936 00:54:50,768 --> 00:54:52,711 LIZ: What are you doing? HOWARD: I, uh... 937 00:54:53,680 --> 00:54:55,535 LIZ: What's that? HOWARD: Oh! 938 00:54:56,656 --> 00:54:58,543 DOLL: You can aIways count on me. 939 00:54:58,640 --> 00:55:00,550 TED: That is Johnny's Turbo Man. 940 00:55:00,656 --> 00:55:03,144 -What? -It's not what you think it is. 941 00:55:03,217 --> 00:55:04,461 LIZ: It isn't? ReaIIy? 942 00:55:04,529 --> 00:55:06,471 What is it? As far as I know, 943 00:55:06,737 --> 00:55:08,940 you got Jamie a Turbo Man weeks ago. 944 00:55:09,009 --> 00:55:11,791 It Iooks Iike you've broken into our neighbor's house... 945 00:55:11,857 --> 00:55:13,515 and you're steaIing presents! 946 00:55:13,584 --> 00:55:16,650 Just give me a second, then I couId expIain it. 947 00:55:16,720 --> 00:55:19,720 Parts of this are going to sound compIeteIy ridicuIous. 948 00:55:20,464 --> 00:55:22,057 Let me teII you the truth. 949 00:55:22,353 --> 00:55:25,614 I've Iistened to you for far too Iong now, 950 00:55:25,681 --> 00:55:28,364 and honestIy, I don't want to anymore. 951 00:55:28,433 --> 00:55:30,767 I want to saIvage what's Ieft of Christmas Eve... 952 00:55:30,833 --> 00:55:32,807 and go to the parade with my son. 953 00:55:34,065 --> 00:55:35,242 Liz, pIease. 954 00:55:37,136 --> 00:55:39,689 -Ted, wouId you drive us? -Of course. 955 00:55:45,041 --> 00:55:47,048 You can't bench-press your way out of this. 956 00:55:54,705 --> 00:55:55,599 [Grr] 957 00:55:57,329 --> 00:55:59,500 You picked the wrong day. 958 00:56:03,921 --> 00:56:05,644 [Moaning] 959 00:56:07,441 --> 00:56:08,554 You started it. 960 00:56:14,481 --> 00:56:17,415 JAMIE: Do you think Dad wiII be at the parade? 961 00:56:17,489 --> 00:56:19,016 I wouIdn't count on it. 962 00:56:21,329 --> 00:56:23,566 JOHNNY: Turbo Man's gonna be there. 963 00:56:23,825 --> 00:56:25,647 You can count on him. 964 00:56:28,881 --> 00:56:30,921 RudoIph, can I buy you another round? 965 00:56:32,402 --> 00:56:33,995 [Burps] 966 00:56:35,313 --> 00:56:36,360 Here. 967 00:57:01,969 --> 00:57:04,391 Sorry, buddy, but you're on your own. 968 00:57:07,089 --> 00:57:09,740 It's time I start keeping my promises. 969 00:57:15,602 --> 00:57:17,457 [PIaying ''JingIe BeIIs''] 970 00:57:40,562 --> 00:57:42,602 MAN: It's that time of year again-- 971 00:57:42,674 --> 00:57:45,423 the 12th annuaI HoIiday Wintertainment Parade. 972 00:57:45,490 --> 00:57:46,951 I'm weatherman GaIe Force... 973 00:57:47,026 --> 00:57:49,448 here with the IoveIy Liza Tisch of ''A.M. Live.'' 974 00:57:49,521 --> 00:57:51,463 Merry Christmas, GaIe. 975 00:57:51,537 --> 00:57:53,992 We're high atop channeI 29's parade centraI... 976 00:57:54,065 --> 00:57:57,164 to keep you updated on aII this year's parade action. 977 00:57:57,842 --> 00:58:00,428 -Let's watch... -And Iisten. 978 00:58:22,834 --> 00:58:24,721 JAMIE: The parade's aIready started! 979 00:58:24,786 --> 00:58:27,306 JOHNNY: Dad, there's Owen and his dad. 980 00:58:27,378 --> 00:58:30,247 Can we stand with them whiIe you park the car? 981 00:58:30,322 --> 00:58:33,737 JAMIE AND JOHNNY: Yeah, pIease? PIease? 982 00:58:33,969 --> 00:58:36,009 TED: OK. We'II meet you there. 983 00:58:36,082 --> 00:58:37,129 JOHNNY: Yeah! 984 00:58:37,202 --> 00:58:40,017 LIZ: And don't go wandering off. JAMIE: OK, Mom. 985 00:58:40,082 --> 00:58:42,733 LIZ: Jamie, wear your hat. JAMIE: I know. 986 00:58:43,378 --> 00:58:45,265 JOHNNY AND JAMIE: Owen! Owen! 987 00:58:45,522 --> 00:58:47,180 OWEN'S FATHER: AII right, kids. Come on. 988 00:58:54,834 --> 00:58:58,609 JAMIE: Oh, wow! Check it out! JOHNNY: You see Turbo Man? 989 00:58:58,706 --> 00:59:00,975 JAMIE: Naw. They're saving him for Iast. 990 00:59:01,042 --> 00:59:01,936 JOHNNY: Ah. 991 00:59:16,466 --> 00:59:20,044 JOHNNY: Ooh! This is awesome. Cat In The Hat! 992 00:59:23,186 --> 00:59:24,680 -Yeah! -Yeah! 993 00:59:24,978 --> 00:59:26,505 HOWARD: Take Fourth Street. 994 00:59:26,578 --> 00:59:29,807 CABBIE: The roads are packed. Everybody's going to the parade. 995 00:59:29,874 --> 00:59:32,395 -Turbo Man's gonna be there. -I know. 996 00:59:47,538 --> 00:59:51,247 Liz, I'm sorry you had to go through that back there. 997 00:59:51,315 --> 00:59:53,802 Here. Have some nonaIcohoIic eggnog. 998 00:59:53,874 --> 00:59:55,697 Oh. I'II be fine. 999 00:59:55,763 --> 00:59:57,737 You can't hide your feeIings from me. 1000 00:59:58,002 --> 01:00:00,849 Let it out. Get it out of your system. 1001 01:00:00,915 --> 01:00:03,086 No, reaIIy, Ted. I'm OK. 1002 01:00:03,154 --> 01:00:04,812 I don't think so. 1003 01:00:04,882 --> 01:00:08,199 Liz, you're Iike a Iost and frightened foaI. 1004 01:00:08,274 --> 01:00:12,846 I can see it in your eyes. Don't worry. 1005 01:00:12,914 --> 01:00:14,386 Ted's here. 1006 01:00:14,386 --> 01:00:16,426 That's...very sweet. 1007 01:00:17,618 --> 01:00:20,553 -You deserve better, Lizzie. -Lizzie? 1008 01:00:20,627 --> 01:00:22,285 Someone you can taIk to. 1009 01:00:22,354 --> 01:00:24,296 A shouIder to cry on. 1010 01:00:34,226 --> 01:00:35,753 It's useIess, Liz. 1011 01:00:35,827 --> 01:00:38,282 We can't hide our feeIings any Ionger. 1012 01:00:38,547 --> 01:00:39,561 FeeIings? 1013 01:00:39,634 --> 01:00:44,434 TED: I don't have to teII you, I'm a very eIigibIe bacheIor. 1014 01:00:44,434 --> 01:00:48,177 Women wouId give anything to be in your position now. 1015 01:00:48,274 --> 01:00:50,991 WeII, I'm a Iucky, Iucky girI. 1016 01:00:52,851 --> 01:00:55,055 For me, it aII started months ago... 1017 01:00:55,155 --> 01:00:57,969 at your Labor Day barbecue. Remember? 1018 01:00:58,067 --> 01:01:01,101 And you asked me how to marinate ahi tuna, 1019 01:01:01,362 --> 01:01:05,519 and I said aII you need is ItaIian saIad dressing. 1020 01:01:15,827 --> 01:01:18,031 Aah! You! 1021 01:01:20,787 --> 01:01:21,997 OFFICER: Stop that man! 1022 01:01:22,867 --> 01:01:23,980 Enough taIking. 1023 01:01:25,043 --> 01:01:26,091 Ow! 1024 01:01:30,099 --> 01:01:33,328 WeII, that didn't exactIy go as weII as I'd hoped. 1025 01:02:08,148 --> 01:02:10,122 MAN: You! Who are you? 1026 01:02:10,195 --> 01:02:11,657 -Are you the guy? -Huh? 1027 01:02:11,732 --> 01:02:13,674 MAN: Thank God. We got him, peopIe! 1028 01:02:13,747 --> 01:02:16,464 Listen up. We're running Iate, so pay attention. 1029 01:02:16,532 --> 01:02:18,571 You read the instruction manuaI we sent you. 1030 01:02:18,643 --> 01:02:20,204 You know about the important controIs. 1031 01:02:20,276 --> 01:02:22,283 Here are a coupIe of the changes. 1032 01:02:22,355 --> 01:02:24,875 There are three cutoff vaIves to the nitrofueI. 1033 01:02:24,947 --> 01:02:26,158 HOWARD: What are you-- 1034 01:02:26,228 --> 01:02:28,170 MAN: The normaI reading on the pressure gauge... 1035 01:02:28,243 --> 01:02:32,237 shouId read beIow 50, not 70 Iike we toId you earIier. 1036 01:02:32,467 --> 01:02:34,027 The emergency cutoff switch is here. 1037 01:02:34,099 --> 01:02:37,263 The primary controIs are going to be right here. 1038 01:02:37,331 --> 01:02:39,186 There's a microphone inside the heImet... 1039 01:02:39,251 --> 01:02:41,357 that wiII aIter your voice to the proper tonaIity. 1040 01:02:41,428 --> 01:02:44,689 Procedure wise, it's Iike we discussed over the phone. 1041 01:02:44,755 --> 01:02:46,992 -Procedure? -There shouIdn't be probIems. 1042 01:02:47,092 --> 01:02:48,466 -Questions? -Yes. 1043 01:02:48,531 --> 01:02:51,466 Let me just take a moment and speak for everyone... 1044 01:02:51,732 --> 01:02:54,579 when I thank you for fiIIing in for Pete. 1045 01:02:54,676 --> 01:02:57,992 It was a totaI freak accident what happened at rehearsaI. 1046 01:02:58,100 --> 01:03:00,718 We got the kinks worked out of it. 1047 01:03:00,819 --> 01:03:04,846 The doctor said Pete showed brain activity this morning. 1048 01:03:05,684 --> 01:03:07,309 That's a reaIIy good sign. 1049 01:03:09,364 --> 01:03:10,509 Move it out, peopIe! 1050 01:03:11,540 --> 01:03:15,369 MAN: FinaIIy! Where the heII have you been? 1051 01:03:15,476 --> 01:03:18,672 I've been sweating Iike a dog in a Chinese restaurant... 1052 01:03:18,739 --> 01:03:21,460 waiting for your sorry ass to show up. 1053 01:03:21,460 --> 01:03:24,013 WeII...it's show time. 1054 01:03:25,619 --> 01:03:27,856 HOWARD: I know you. You're Booster. 1055 01:03:27,924 --> 01:03:31,666 BOOSTER: Who do you think you are--Mary Poppins? 1056 01:03:31,764 --> 01:03:33,935 MAN: Come on! Let's go! Let's do it! 1057 01:03:34,003 --> 01:03:35,149 Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! 1058 01:03:35,219 --> 01:03:37,707 HOWARD: Wait. MAN: Have a great show. 1059 01:03:44,980 --> 01:03:47,729 LIZA: Now for the moment you've been waiting for, 1060 01:03:47,795 --> 01:03:48,908 here he is. 1061 01:03:48,980 --> 01:03:52,526 Live and in person, Turbo Man! 1062 01:04:17,140 --> 01:04:18,188 Wow. 1063 01:04:21,908 --> 01:04:24,777 BOOSTER: Wave, you idiot! Wave! 1064 01:04:24,852 --> 01:04:25,997 HOWARD: Wave? 1065 01:04:27,700 --> 01:04:28,911 Yes. 1066 01:04:38,324 --> 01:04:40,299 This is cooI. Ha ha! 1067 01:04:40,692 --> 01:04:41,739 JOHNNY: Yeah! Whoo! 1068 01:04:41,812 --> 01:04:43,667 JAMIE: Mom ! It's Turbo Man! 1069 01:04:46,228 --> 01:04:48,203 LIZ: Ha ha ha! 1070 01:04:50,324 --> 01:04:51,786 I can get into this. 1071 01:05:14,229 --> 01:05:18,003 GALE: Turbo Man wiII seIect a chiId from our audience. 1072 01:05:18,100 --> 01:05:20,173 LIZA: That chiId wiII be the winner... 1073 01:05:20,245 --> 01:05:22,481 of a speciaI edition Turbo Man doII. 1074 01:05:27,188 --> 01:05:28,660 JOHNNY: Aw, man! Awesome! 1075 01:05:28,660 --> 01:05:30,002 JOHNNY: Aw, man! Awesome! 1076 01:05:30,068 --> 01:05:32,403 BOOSTER: Hey! You're supposed to be hoIding this! 1077 01:05:32,469 --> 01:05:33,417 Oh? 1078 01:05:37,044 --> 01:05:38,321 Ahh. 1079 01:05:47,669 --> 01:05:50,865 HOWARD: Yes! Yes! 1080 01:06:02,133 --> 01:06:03,922 BOOSTER: Hey, rock star? HOWARD: Yeah? 1081 01:06:03,989 --> 01:06:05,167 BOOSTER: Be on your toes. 1082 01:06:05,237 --> 01:06:08,553 Dementor wiII be jumping on the fIoat soon. 1083 01:06:10,037 --> 01:06:11,378 Wha--Aah! 1084 01:06:15,253 --> 01:06:16,497 BOOSTER: Oh, what's he doing? 1085 01:06:16,565 --> 01:06:18,932 WouId you pick a kid aIready? 1086 01:06:20,084 --> 01:06:21,099 Pick a kid? 1087 01:06:21,173 --> 01:06:25,330 BOOSTER: Pick a kid so he can come up here and get his prize! 1088 01:06:25,397 --> 01:06:26,706 Pick me, Turbo Man! 1089 01:06:26,773 --> 01:06:27,983 Over here! 1090 01:06:30,165 --> 01:06:31,856 Pick me! Pick me! 1091 01:06:31,925 --> 01:06:32,873 JOHNNY: Over here! 1092 01:06:34,421 --> 01:06:36,625 JAMIE: He's Iooking at me. JOHNNY: He's Iooking at me. 1093 01:06:39,349 --> 01:06:41,618 JAMIE: He's pointing at me. JOHNNY: Naw, it's me! 1094 01:06:41,685 --> 01:06:44,238 JAMIE: Me! JOHNNY: Me! 1095 01:06:44,309 --> 01:06:45,553 JAMIE: Me! JOHNNY: Me! 1096 01:06:46,901 --> 01:06:48,145 Jamie! 1097 01:06:50,837 --> 01:06:53,226 He knows my name. 1098 01:07:03,413 --> 01:07:05,552 GALE: Turbo Man has seIected a winner. 1099 01:07:06,325 --> 01:07:09,456 Go ahead. Go ahead, honey. Go. Go, Jamie! 1100 01:07:26,709 --> 01:07:28,597 Merry Christmas, Jamie. 1101 01:07:34,390 --> 01:07:35,633 JOHNNY: Whoo! 1102 01:07:39,317 --> 01:07:43,540 JAMIE: Wow. How did you know my name? 1103 01:07:43,829 --> 01:07:47,342 WeII, Jamie, you see, I'm your fa-- 1104 01:07:53,590 --> 01:07:55,116 LIZA: Oh, no, kids! 1105 01:07:55,189 --> 01:07:58,037 It's Turbo Man's archenemy Dementor! 1106 01:07:58,134 --> 01:08:00,239 [Audience booing] 1107 01:08:03,286 --> 01:08:05,936 Aw, shut up! Shut up! 1108 01:08:06,005 --> 01:08:07,286 GALE: Was that scripted? 1109 01:08:07,286 --> 01:08:10,068 AII right, kid. Give me the doII, and nobody gets hurt. 1110 01:08:10,837 --> 01:08:11,917 Myron? 1111 01:08:11,990 --> 01:08:13,713 That's right, TurtIe Man. 1112 01:08:13,781 --> 01:08:15,756 Thought you couId outsmart me, didn't you? 1113 01:08:15,830 --> 01:08:18,285 Thought your IittIe suit idea was so sIick. 1114 01:08:18,358 --> 01:08:22,798 I'm one step ahead of you because I've got a bigger brain. 1115 01:08:23,446 --> 01:08:24,875 HOWARD: Just stay here. 1116 01:08:26,742 --> 01:08:29,644 Come on, Myron. You're taking this too far. 1117 01:08:29,750 --> 01:08:32,019 I'm not going home without that doII! 1118 01:08:32,086 --> 01:08:35,631 BOOSTER: This ain't the way we rehearsed it! 1119 01:08:35,990 --> 01:08:38,608 You know what? Nobody Iikes you, Booster. 1120 01:08:39,637 --> 01:08:40,815 BOOSTER: Ooh! Whoa! 1121 01:08:42,261 --> 01:08:45,196 -We don't Iike you! -We hate you, Booster! 1122 01:08:45,270 --> 01:08:46,252 [Gasps] 1123 01:08:46,326 --> 01:08:47,438 MYRON: Where are you going, kid? 1124 01:08:47,510 --> 01:08:49,452 Come back here, my IittIe pretty, 1125 01:08:49,526 --> 01:08:50,955 and your IittIe doII, too! 1126 01:08:51,030 --> 01:08:53,266 HOWARD: Hey, Myron! Leave the kid aIone! 1127 01:08:54,070 --> 01:08:56,045 Ta-ta, TurtIe Man. 1128 01:08:58,550 --> 01:08:59,891 LIZ: Boo! Boo! 1129 01:09:01,813 --> 01:09:04,148 Ha ha ha! 1130 01:09:05,238 --> 01:09:07,955 GALE: It Iooks Iike Dementor has beaten Turbo Man. 1131 01:09:08,054 --> 01:09:11,796 LIZA: This couId be the end of civiIization as we know it. 1132 01:09:13,302 --> 01:09:15,157 JAMIE: Do something, Turbo Man! 1133 01:09:15,222 --> 01:09:18,517 Use your turbo disc! On your arm ! 1134 01:09:20,822 --> 01:09:23,058 Hey, Myron! I have a speciaI deIivery for you. 1135 01:09:23,286 --> 01:09:24,596 -Huh? -Hah! 1136 01:09:34,870 --> 01:09:36,015 Yeah! 1137 01:09:36,086 --> 01:09:38,388 Ha ha ha! 1138 01:09:38,454 --> 01:09:41,520 LIZA: It appears that Turbo Man has saved the day. 1139 01:09:42,839 --> 01:09:45,457 HOWARD: I'm going to take you back to your mom, OK? 1140 01:09:45,526 --> 01:09:46,704 DEMON TEAM: Demon team ! 1141 01:09:47,126 --> 01:09:49,712 GALE: It's the Demon Team-- Dementor's eviI henchmen! 1142 01:09:49,782 --> 01:09:51,244 Whatcha gonna do now, kid? 1143 01:09:51,350 --> 01:09:53,390 JAMIE: Hyah! MYRON: Oh! 1144 01:09:53,462 --> 01:09:55,218 [SqueaIing] 1145 01:09:58,454 --> 01:10:01,749 HOWARD: What about my son? DEMON: FoIIow the choreography! 1146 01:10:02,230 --> 01:10:04,619 JAMIE: Mom ! LIZ: Jamie! 1147 01:10:06,262 --> 01:10:07,724 MYRON: I ain't done, kid! 1148 01:10:10,871 --> 01:10:13,260 MYRON: Get out my way, box! BOX: Oh! 1149 01:10:20,023 --> 01:10:21,845 MYRON: Come here! I'm sorry I hoIIered! 1150 01:10:21,910 --> 01:10:23,219 Get out of my way! 1151 01:10:25,942 --> 01:10:27,917 Get out of my way! Come here, boy! 1152 01:10:27,990 --> 01:10:30,543 Get that popcorn out of my face! Come on! 1153 01:10:33,686 --> 01:10:35,988 Kid, you need a time-out. 1154 01:10:37,399 --> 01:10:38,413 LIZ: Jamie! 1155 01:10:38,486 --> 01:10:40,788 OFFICER: It's just a show. Get back on the sidewaIk. 1156 01:10:40,854 --> 01:10:42,359 LIZ: That's my son! 1157 01:10:42,359 --> 01:10:45,490 OFFICER: He's wonderfuI! LIZ: He's not part of the show! 1158 01:10:47,159 --> 01:10:48,719 MYRON: I'm scared of heights. 1159 01:10:48,790 --> 01:10:51,245 You see the movie Vertigo? That mean anything to you? 1160 01:10:51,991 --> 01:10:58,581 DEMON: Get this guy! What are you doing? Aah! 1161 01:11:01,847 --> 01:11:03,472 MYRON: UncIe Myron wants to taIk. 1162 01:11:06,518 --> 01:11:09,486 AII right, kid! End of the Iine! Give me the doII! 1163 01:11:09,558 --> 01:11:10,835 Never! 1164 01:11:11,383 --> 01:11:12,276 Oh! 1165 01:11:21,014 --> 01:11:23,469 LIZA: FIy! FIy, Turbo Man! Use your jet pack! 1166 01:11:31,255 --> 01:11:36,143 It's turbo time! 1167 01:11:36,247 --> 01:11:37,741 Wow! 1168 01:11:37,847 --> 01:11:43,662 Whoa! 1169 01:11:46,359 --> 01:11:52,791 Aah! 1170 01:11:52,791 --> 01:11:54,133 [Boom] 1171 01:11:54,199 --> 01:11:55,508 Aah! 1172 01:12:09,623 --> 01:12:17,463 HOWARD: I think I'm getting the hang of this! 1173 01:12:17,463 --> 01:12:19,285 Turbo Man! HeIp! 1174 01:12:19,351 --> 01:12:20,977 HOWARD: Jamie! I got you! 1175 01:12:22,327 --> 01:12:23,854 Jamie! Uh. 1176 01:12:23,959 --> 01:12:25,847 HOWARD: Oh. Out of my way! 1177 01:12:49,847 --> 01:12:50,927 WOMAN: Let us pray. 1178 01:12:57,751 --> 01:12:58,679 What the-- 1179 01:13:07,383 --> 01:13:09,172 Whoa! 1180 01:13:14,263 --> 01:13:15,790 MYRON: I got you, kid. 1181 01:13:16,791 --> 01:13:20,686 Aah! 1182 01:13:20,792 --> 01:13:23,181 Aah! 1183 01:13:29,015 --> 01:13:30,161 MYRON: Give me the doII, kid! 1184 01:13:34,455 --> 01:13:37,073 JAMIE: Turbo Man, use your turbo-rang! 1185 01:13:37,976 --> 01:13:38,924 Come on! 1186 01:13:42,008 --> 01:13:45,106 MYRON: Ha ha! Missed me! Ha ha ha! 1187 01:13:49,240 --> 01:13:51,695 -Oh! -Ha ha! Victory is mine! 1188 01:13:51,768 --> 01:13:54,288 Ha ha ha! V-i-c-t-o-r-y! 1189 01:13:54,360 --> 01:13:55,375 Ooh! 1190 01:13:55,991 --> 01:13:57,366 Aah! 1191 01:14:01,752 --> 01:14:02,645 Yeah! 1192 01:14:05,175 --> 01:14:06,353 Wow! 1193 01:14:06,424 --> 01:14:07,984 I got it! I got one! 1194 01:14:08,055 --> 01:14:09,844 I finaIIy got one! 1195 01:14:16,599 --> 01:14:20,047 -Turbo Man! HeIp! -Jamie! 1196 01:14:21,464 --> 01:14:26,549 JAMIE: Aah! 1197 01:14:26,616 --> 01:14:27,510 HOWARD: Gotcha! 1198 01:14:28,152 --> 01:14:29,167 JOHNNY: Yes! 1199 01:14:30,776 --> 01:14:33,591 JAMIE: Thanks, Turbo Man. I knew you'd save me. 1200 01:14:33,688 --> 01:14:35,695 HOWARD: You can aIways count on me. 1201 01:14:39,224 --> 01:14:40,719 [Cheering] 1202 01:14:55,449 --> 01:14:56,594 Awesome! 1203 01:15:03,032 --> 01:15:04,079 HOWARD: Here you go, ma'am. 1204 01:15:04,632 --> 01:15:07,384 Mom ! Did you see? I fIew with Turbo Man! 1205 01:15:07,384 --> 01:15:09,075 He saved me from Dementor! 1206 01:15:09,144 --> 01:15:11,664 It was the cooIest! Did you see? Did you? 1207 01:15:11,736 --> 01:15:13,940 LIZ: I saw. I saw. 1208 01:15:14,872 --> 01:15:18,767 Thank you. I don't think you know how much he means to me. 1209 01:15:18,841 --> 01:15:21,558 Oh, I think I have an idea. 1210 01:15:23,896 --> 01:15:25,357 What's the matter, Jame? 1211 01:15:25,464 --> 01:15:28,944 It's just, I wish that Dad couId have been here, you know? 1212 01:15:29,049 --> 01:15:30,991 To see me fIy and aII. 1213 01:15:31,096 --> 01:15:34,893 But he didn't come, and it's aII my fauIt. 1214 01:15:35,001 --> 01:15:37,903 He's mad at me. We had a fight on the phone, 1215 01:15:38,008 --> 01:15:40,147 and I kind of yeIIed at him. 1216 01:15:40,216 --> 01:15:43,511 HOWARD: Jamie, your dad is not mad at you. 1217 01:15:43,608 --> 01:15:46,358 He Ioves you more than anything in the whoIe, wide worId. 1218 01:15:47,481 --> 01:15:49,488 You're his aII-time favorite person. 1219 01:15:49,913 --> 01:15:51,407 How do you know aII that? 1220 01:15:51,513 --> 01:15:55,309 WeII, who wouId know better than me? 1221 01:15:55,961 --> 01:15:58,164 -Dad? -Howard? 1222 01:15:58,233 --> 01:15:59,694 Right here. 1223 01:16:00,632 --> 01:16:02,934 -Howard! -Oh, Liz... 1224 01:16:03,001 --> 01:16:05,140 you two mean more to me than anything. 1225 01:16:05,209 --> 01:16:07,630 I'm sorry I haven't shown that IateIy. 1226 01:16:08,409 --> 01:16:10,864 I know I've been negIecting both of you, 1227 01:16:10,936 --> 01:16:12,365 but no more. 1228 01:16:12,441 --> 01:16:15,343 I Iove you. I Iove you both. 1229 01:16:15,417 --> 01:16:17,075 TED: Johnny, what's going on here? 1230 01:16:17,145 --> 01:16:19,512 JOHNNY: Look! Jamie's dad is Turbo Man! 1231 01:16:20,153 --> 01:16:22,836 TED: Let's get out of here. JOHNNY: You smeII Iike barf! 1232 01:16:25,273 --> 01:16:28,688 OFFICER: Young man...I have something that beIongs to you. 1233 01:16:31,352 --> 01:16:32,978 -Thanks! -You're weIcome. 1234 01:16:33,049 --> 01:16:37,140 And as for you, Turbo Man, we couId use you on the force. 1235 01:16:39,384 --> 01:16:41,905 Thanks. I'II keep that in mind. 1236 01:16:43,321 --> 01:16:48,406 Oh, I'm sorry about the bike... and the coffee... 1237 01:16:49,305 --> 01:16:53,167 and the bus... and, uh, the bomb. 1238 01:16:53,753 --> 01:16:57,647 MYRON: I had it! I had it right here in my hands! 1239 01:16:57,721 --> 01:16:59,481 What wiII I teII my son Christmas morning? 1240 01:16:59,481 --> 01:17:02,710 -How wiII I Iook him in the eye? -Wait. 1241 01:17:02,776 --> 01:17:05,362 MYRON: I had it, man. JAMIE: Wait. 1242 01:17:07,833 --> 01:17:09,010 Merry Christmas. 1243 01:17:10,809 --> 01:17:13,079 Wow. Wow. 1244 01:17:13,689 --> 01:17:16,537 -But... -Hey, thank you. Thank you. 1245 01:17:17,561 --> 01:17:20,627 You know, this is going to make my son reaIIy happy. 1246 01:17:20,697 --> 01:17:23,479 I'm sorry about that IittIe tension we had on the roof. 1247 01:17:23,545 --> 01:17:24,657 JAMIE: Hey, it's cooI. 1248 01:17:25,657 --> 01:17:29,913 But, Jamie, I thought you wanted this doII more than anything. 1249 01:17:30,010 --> 01:17:33,806 I don't need the doII. I got the reaI Turbo Man at home. 1250 01:17:33,913 --> 01:17:34,960 Oh! 1251 01:17:36,825 --> 01:17:38,254 That--that's my husband. 1252 01:17:38,361 --> 01:17:40,881 CROWD: Turbo Man! Turbo Man! 1253 01:17:44,633 --> 01:17:47,535 That's my dad! That's my dad! 1254 01:18:03,802 --> 01:18:04,914 BRIAN SETZER SINGING: JingIe beIIs 1255 01:18:04,985 --> 01:18:05,912 JingIe beIIs 1256 01:18:06,009 --> 01:18:08,464 JingIe aII the way 1257 01:18:08,537 --> 01:18:10,392 Oh, what fun it is to ride 1258 01:18:10,457 --> 01:18:12,726 In a '57 ChevroIet 1259 01:18:12,794 --> 01:18:13,841 JingIe beIIs 1260 01:18:13,914 --> 01:18:15,190 JingIe beIIs 1261 01:18:15,257 --> 01:18:17,646 JingIe aII the way 1262 01:18:17,721 --> 01:18:19,631 Oh, what fun it is to ride 1263 01:18:19,866 --> 01:18:22,135 In a one-horse open sIeigh 1264 01:18:22,202 --> 01:18:24,111 Dashing through the snow 1265 01:18:24,185 --> 01:18:26,706 In a one-horse open sIeigh 1266 01:18:26,777 --> 01:18:29,014 Over those fieIds we go 1267 01:18:29,081 --> 01:18:31,154 Laughing aII the way 1268 01:18:31,386 --> 01:18:33,524 BeIIs on bobtaiIs ring 1269 01:18:33,658 --> 01:18:35,665 Making spirits bright 1270 01:18:35,738 --> 01:18:40,080 What fun it is to ride and sing a sIeighing song tonight 1271 01:18:40,153 --> 01:18:41,430 Oh, jingIe beIIs 1272 01:18:41,498 --> 01:18:42,905 J-jingIe beIIs 1273 01:18:42,970 --> 01:18:45,239 JingIe aII the way 1274 01:18:45,305 --> 01:18:47,247 Oh, what fun it is to ride 1275 01:18:47,321 --> 01:18:49,842 In a '57 ChevroIet 1276 01:18:49,914 --> 01:18:52,085 JingIe beIIs, jingIe beIIs 1277 01:18:52,154 --> 01:18:54,488 JingIe aII the way 1278 01:18:54,553 --> 01:18:56,528 Oh, what fun it is to ride 1279 01:18:56,602 --> 01:18:58,424 In a one-horse open sIeigh 1280 01:18:58,489 --> 01:18:59,438 Ow! 1281 01:19:12,281 --> 01:19:13,175 Hey! 1282 01:19:17,689 --> 01:19:19,599 Dashing through the snow 1283 01:19:19,674 --> 01:19:22,325 In a one-horse open sIeigh 1284 01:19:22,394 --> 01:19:24,597 Over those fieIds we go 1285 01:19:24,666 --> 01:19:27,055 Laughing, Iaughing, Iaughing, Iaughing 1286 01:19:27,130 --> 01:19:29,203 BeIIs on bobtaiI ring 1287 01:19:29,274 --> 01:19:31,346 Making those spirits bright 1288 01:19:31,418 --> 01:19:35,160 What fun it is to ride and sing a sIeighing song tonight 1289 01:19:35,290 --> 01:19:36,184 Ow! 1290 01:19:36,250 --> 01:19:37,265 JingIe beIIs 1291 01:19:37,370 --> 01:19:40,753 JingIe, jingIe, jingIe aII the way 1292 01:19:40,858 --> 01:19:42,713 Oh, what fun it is to ride 1293 01:19:42,778 --> 01:19:45,331 In a '57 ChevroIet 1294 01:19:45,434 --> 01:19:47,539 JingIe beIIs, jingIe beIIs 1295 01:19:47,642 --> 01:19:50,064 JingIe aII the way 1296 01:19:50,170 --> 01:19:52,374 Oh, what fun it is to ride 1297 01:19:52,442 --> 01:19:54,809 In a one-horse 1298 01:19:54,906 --> 01:19:57,110 Open 1299 01:19:57,178 --> 01:20:00,048 SIeigh 1300 01:21:18,843 --> 01:21:24,113 LOU RAWLS SINGING: So they say it's Christmastime again 1301 01:21:24,218 --> 01:21:27,033 The caIendar says December 1302 01:21:27,098 --> 01:21:30,098 But it's wrong 1303 01:21:30,170 --> 01:21:33,269 'Cause Christmas is the time 1304 01:21:33,339 --> 01:21:36,568 When Iovers pray divine 1305 01:21:36,634 --> 01:21:42,483 And peopIe are meeting and two hearts are beating 1306 01:21:42,587 --> 01:21:47,541 So they say it's Christmastime, I know 1307 01:21:47,643 --> 01:21:53,273 But I'II just keep pretending untiI they go 1308 01:21:53,339 --> 01:21:56,056 'Cause if they say it's Christmas 1309 01:21:56,123 --> 01:21:59,352 I'II think you're here with me 1310 01:21:59,418 --> 01:22:06,707 If they say it's Christmastime again 1311 01:22:09,626 --> 01:22:14,678 I wonder when your Christmas card wiII come 1312 01:22:14,747 --> 01:22:21,042 I'II bet it's that same oId winter one 1313 01:22:21,115 --> 01:22:24,660 Where peopIe are happy 1314 01:22:24,731 --> 01:22:27,579 And fuII of that joy 1315 01:22:27,579 --> 01:22:33,208 The spirit of giving and Ioving and Iiving 1316 01:22:33,307 --> 01:22:38,577 So you know when Christmas roIIs around 1317 01:22:38,651 --> 01:22:44,347 I just can't heIp but feeIing kind of down 1318 01:22:44,411 --> 01:22:47,291 'Cause you're my Christmastime 1319 01:22:47,291 --> 01:22:50,968 You're who I'm thinking of 1320 01:22:51,035 --> 01:22:57,746 When they say it's Christmastime, my Iove 1321 01:22:57,820 --> 01:23:03,570 Christmastime, my Iove 1322 01:23:03,643 --> 01:23:06,458 It's Christmastime 1323 01:23:57,115 --> 01:24:02,647 So you know when Christmas roIIs around 1324 01:24:02,715 --> 01:24:08,531 I just can't heIp but feeIing kind of down 1325 01:24:08,636 --> 01:24:11,353 'Cause you're my Christmastime 1326 01:24:11,420 --> 01:24:15,282 The one I'm thinking of 1327 01:24:16,572 --> 01:24:27,123 When they say it's Christmastime, my Iove 1328 01:24:27,196 --> 01:24:32,892 It's Christmastime 1329 01:24:33,116 --> 01:24:35,986 My Iove 1330 01:24:37,948 --> 01:24:43,708 It's Christmastime, my Iove 1331 01:24:43,708 --> 01:24:48,793 It's Christmastime 1332 01:24:48,860 --> 01:24:53,595 Christmastime, my Iove 1333 01:24:54,972 --> 01:25:05,207 Christmastime, my Iove 1334 01:25:16,028 --> 01:25:17,369 LIZ: Yay! 1335 01:25:17,436 --> 01:25:18,930 HOWARD: Look at that! There it is. 1336 01:25:19,004 --> 01:25:20,859 JAMIE: VoiIa! LIZ: BeautifuI! 1337 01:25:20,924 --> 01:25:22,385 JAMIE: Perfecto! 1338 01:25:26,044 --> 01:25:28,891 Howard, I've been thinking. 1339 01:25:28,956 --> 01:25:30,996 Everything that you went through today for Jamie... 1340 01:25:31,069 --> 01:25:32,923 reaIIy shows how much you Iove him. 1341 01:25:33,660 --> 01:25:35,515 And, uh, and if you're wiIIing... 1342 01:25:35,580 --> 01:25:39,442 to go through aII of that for him just for a present, 1343 01:25:39,516 --> 01:25:41,239 weII, that makes me wonder. 1344 01:25:42,589 --> 01:25:43,516 What? 1345 01:25:45,436 --> 01:25:46,680 What did you get me?